That Which Gives Me Wood

Hallie walked up to Wifezilla the other day and informed her to not take Boniva “if she’s pregnant or can become pregnant.”

At least, I think it was for Boniva. There are so many of those commercials I can’t keep them or their highly descriptive side effects straight. Now, joy of joys, not only is my daughter quoting them, she’s also diagnosing their undesired symptoms on her parents.

Thanks a bunch Bayer Pharmaceutical Corporation.

I’ll admit my current favorite side effect is a “decrease in semen,” caused by a drug used to treat ED or erectile dysfunction. Nothing like watching the national news and then picturing that mental image. How in the world can a drug simultaneously give you a runny nose AND cause a decrease in semen? That’s messed up.

I think it’s Levitra that dams up a guy’s semen while opening the floodgates for his snot, but again, I may be confusing it with one of the hundreds of other drugs advertised on the nightly news. I wonder how Brian Williams feels about how I’ve come to associate him with ED, high-blood pressure, and premature bone loss?

By the way, check out Levitra’s website. They have a link that invites you to “See how erections happen and how they sometimes don’t.”

Fascinating, yes? And informative, no?

I’m not sure what I’ll do when Hallie informs me what Levitra can do to me. Run screaming, probably.