Saturday, August 30, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Wrath of the Lich King Dungeon Footage
Some dudes at Gamespot have some video of them plumming the depths of WotLK's darkest dungeons.
Mines of Moria Pre-Order
1UP reports that pre-orders for the Lord of the Rings Online expansion, Mines of Moria, are gearing up in Europe. They've a nice screen shot of the three different packages available.
I've been MMO free for more than a month now, but I'm not sure I can resist the siren call of this game. I try and quit and always end up coming back months later. A shiny new expansion won't help that dismal track record. If I can just last until Fallout 3 hits the shelves, I should be good.
I've been MMO free for more than a month now, but I'm not sure I can resist the siren call of this game. I try and quit and always end up coming back months later. A shiny new expansion won't help that dismal track record. If I can just last until Fallout 3 hits the shelves, I should be good.
Hurm
Rorschach could be the coolest superhero in all of comicdom. He definitely has the coolest one-liner of any superhero: hurm. I don't know why, but it cracks me up when he says it. It usually follows a monologue or conversation he doesn't approve of, a kind of mellow hrmp!, all the conviction with none of the emotion. I also like the wavy dialogue balloons Alan Moore uses for Rorschach. I noticed immediately that when Rorschach was in prison and maskless, the wavy balloon reverted to normal. When Nite Owl and that skank rescue him and he gets his costume back, the rumbling returns. Ah, pure genius.
Like most things I read and then analyze, I'm waaaay behind the relevant curve. This time, almost twenty-five years. Which surprises me because I was fifteen when The Watchmen came out. I wasn't collecting or even reading comics which I guess put me enough out of the loop that the graphic novel went completely past my consciousness. The novel's recent trailer in front of Batman has spurred renewed interest both from loyal fans and the rest of us who were in the dark. I can't fathom how they're going to summarize The Watchmen into a quality movie experience. I'm a huge fan of its movie type, namely Sin City and 300, so I'm ripe for disappointment.
But if all they do is get Rorschach right, it's all good.
Like most things I read and then analyze, I'm waaaay behind the relevant curve. This time, almost twenty-five years. Which surprises me because I was fifteen when The Watchmen came out. I wasn't collecting or even reading comics which I guess put me enough out of the loop that the graphic novel went completely past my consciousness. The novel's recent trailer in front of Batman has spurred renewed interest both from loyal fans and the rest of us who were in the dark. I can't fathom how they're going to summarize The Watchmen into a quality movie experience. I'm a huge fan of its movie type, namely Sin City and 300, so I'm ripe for disappointment.
But if all they do is get Rorschach right, it's all good.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Hallie's Lord of the Rings
As a little kid, I was a ferocious reader. I could read well and fast at an early age and enjoyed it. By the fourth grade, I was knee-deep in Tolkien. First The Hobbit, later the Lord of the Rings. That's fairly precocious content for a ten year old, even a geek. I'm not pretending I understood every nuance and plot twist as much as an adult reader. But I loved those books. The passion I read from Tolkien translated into other fantasy authors, like Terry Brooks and Edgar Rice Burroughs, and later into much of the content I read today, including comics, American literature, and political news magazines like Snoozeweek.
My oldest daughter, Hallie, just started the second grade this week. For the past two years, I've been reading the Peter and the Starcatchers series aloud to her. She adores Peter Pan. She's seen the Disney film countless times and when I noticed Barry and Pearson's book about the timeless character, I knew I had to buy it and read it to her. We're on the third book in the series already, Peter and the Secret of Rundoon. It's a great series, likely as entertaining to adults as it is to kids, its intended audience. And a welcome escape from the 100 pound gorilla of children's literature, the Harry Potter series.
Unbeknownst to me, while I've been reading Rundoon to Hallie every other night or so, she went back to the first book. Reading it herself, surreptitiously. I had no idea until Wifezilla clued me in. I asked Hallie if she understood what she was reading and she said, "Yeah, most of it," in the kind of casual tone that leads me to believe she's processing most if not all of it full blast. Tonight, I snuck up just outside her room to eavesdrop. It's not nice to spy on people, but screw that! She's my kid and all I do I do in the name of Daddys across the country. Anyway, I wanted to get a sense of her reading. She's so little, she still reads to herself aloud. Her narration is excellent, if not a bit too fast. I can tell she's processing the words faster than her mouth can pronounce them, one of the reasons why reading teachers have kids shift to silent reading eventually. She also inflects her voice according to the dialogue, unlike most of her peers, who read with the kind of dull monotone that would shame that teacher who says Bueller over and over again.
All this is well and good, but I'm mostly bursting with pride right now. Wifezilla and I have read to our girls since in utero. Yes, I actually read to Wifezilla's belly. Less with Claire, but belly-reading took place nonetheless. The girls' rooms are absolutely stuffed with books. Of all kinds too. And it seems to have paid off. All on her own, Hallie has latched on to a series of books that she loves. She's reading them on her own now, with absolutely no compulsion or force. I know she'll move on to other books from here. It's just the beginning for her and I'm excited for the road she's about to travel. And I'm relieved. Reading is the foundation for all learning. If she can master it, she can do anything. And if she can do anything, she can accomplish everything.
And everything is exactly what I want for her.
My oldest daughter, Hallie, just started the second grade this week. For the past two years, I've been reading the Peter and the Starcatchers series aloud to her. She adores Peter Pan. She's seen the Disney film countless times and when I noticed Barry and Pearson's book about the timeless character, I knew I had to buy it and read it to her. We're on the third book in the series already, Peter and the Secret of Rundoon. It's a great series, likely as entertaining to adults as it is to kids, its intended audience. And a welcome escape from the 100 pound gorilla of children's literature, the Harry Potter series.
Unbeknownst to me, while I've been reading Rundoon to Hallie every other night or so, she went back to the first book. Reading it herself, surreptitiously. I had no idea until Wifezilla clued me in. I asked Hallie if she understood what she was reading and she said, "Yeah, most of it," in the kind of casual tone that leads me to believe she's processing most if not all of it full blast. Tonight, I snuck up just outside her room to eavesdrop. It's not nice to spy on people, but screw that! She's my kid and all I do I do in the name of Daddys across the country. Anyway, I wanted to get a sense of her reading. She's so little, she still reads to herself aloud. Her narration is excellent, if not a bit too fast. I can tell she's processing the words faster than her mouth can pronounce them, one of the reasons why reading teachers have kids shift to silent reading eventually. She also inflects her voice according to the dialogue, unlike most of her peers, who read with the kind of dull monotone that would shame that teacher who says Bueller over and over again.
All this is well and good, but I'm mostly bursting with pride right now. Wifezilla and I have read to our girls since in utero. Yes, I actually read to Wifezilla's belly. Less with Claire, but belly-reading took place nonetheless. The girls' rooms are absolutely stuffed with books. Of all kinds too. And it seems to have paid off. All on her own, Hallie has latched on to a series of books that she loves. She's reading them on her own now, with absolutely no compulsion or force. I know she'll move on to other books from here. It's just the beginning for her and I'm excited for the road she's about to travel. And I'm relieved. Reading is the foundation for all learning. If she can master it, she can do anything. And if she can do anything, she can accomplish everything.
And everything is exactly what I want for her.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Haircuts for Horde?
1UP reports that World of Warcraft is getting a pre-Wrath of the Lich King patch, which will include the inscription profession and barbershops.
Which is good because there are a lot of fugly toons out there. I'm not sure a haircut can help them, but it certainly can't hurt.
Which is good because there are a lot of fugly toons out there. I'm not sure a haircut can help them, but it certainly can't hurt.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Hair Balls
I live with three women. I also clean the bathrooms and mop the floors. These two seemingly unrelated facts collided in spectacular fashion Sunday when I went to scrub the kitchen floor. I hadn’t even started when I noticed a massive wad of hair sticking to the side of the mop. An unfortunate residue from last week’s cleaning session. After I quenched a gag, I carefully removed the follicles by the narrowest of fingertips and made my way to Wifezilla.
“You see this?” I said accusingly. “You women shed like wookies and yet I’m the one who cleans it up! This is an outrage! I demand a reallocation of jobs!”
Wifezilla stopped cleaning the kitchen for a moment to glance at the hairy evidence. She smiled at me knowingly, like a lion with a mouthful of zebra. “Listen, when you have to start scraping off the skid marks in the girls' underwear, than you’ll have something to complain about.” She went back to the grizzly work of gutting and devouring her zebra.
I was left speechless. Defeated. I really hate it when I lose these battles.
“You see this?” I said accusingly. “You women shed like wookies and yet I’m the one who cleans it up! This is an outrage! I demand a reallocation of jobs!”
Wifezilla stopped cleaning the kitchen for a moment to glance at the hairy evidence. She smiled at me knowingly, like a lion with a mouthful of zebra. “Listen, when you have to start scraping off the skid marks in the girls' underwear, than you’ll have something to complain about.” She went back to the grizzly work of gutting and devouring her zebra.
I was left speechless. Defeated. I really hate it when I lose these battles.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
The Witcher Finished
***Spoile Alert***
I wrapped up The Witcher this afternoon. From start to finish, I enjoyed this game. Having never read the books, I can't say how closely the game followed them. But towards the end, the The Witcher introduced and mixed some 21st century issues within fictionalized fantasy world. Racism, fascism, climate change, scientific experimentation, temporal realities, paternity: all strewn throughout the story in a fairly cohesive manner. I was a bit surprised that some of these themes hinted subtly at the exploits of Hitler and Nazi Germany, especially the Grand Master's rational for raging a war against the demihumans. Clearly, that history still permeates the European consciousness. As it should.
The ending cutscene was beautifully rendered. Geralt receives his coin directly from the King and then leaves. On the way out, he notices guards dead by the entrance. He turns around and sees an assassin cutting through the page and jumping upon the King. Geralt charges and the two engage. They're well-matched, exchanging blows and parries as they dance within the apex of the throne room. Geralt finally gets an opening and lops off the assassin's arm, following with a death blow. When he uncovers the assassin's mask, he gasps in recognition.
I'm not going to tell you what he sees because if you haven't played this game, you find out for yourself. Yes, the game has a clunky translation. But the story's background and world framework are solid and the gameplay fun and intuitive. The fact that CDProjekt is coding an upcoming patch to fix some of the voice-over and dialogue is a strong testament of their commitment to making a great game. I'm looking forward to playing the sequels.
Up next: Neverwinter Nights 2 and its expansion, the Mask of the Betrayer. I might revisit The Witcher after the patch comes out, supposedly next month, but the game is so long, I doubt I'll have the time to finish it again.
I wrapped up The Witcher this afternoon. From start to finish, I enjoyed this game. Having never read the books, I can't say how closely the game followed them. But towards the end, the The Witcher introduced and mixed some 21st century issues within fictionalized fantasy world. Racism, fascism, climate change, scientific experimentation, temporal realities, paternity: all strewn throughout the story in a fairly cohesive manner. I was a bit surprised that some of these themes hinted subtly at the exploits of Hitler and Nazi Germany, especially the Grand Master's rational for raging a war against the demihumans. Clearly, that history still permeates the European consciousness. As it should.
The ending cutscene was beautifully rendered. Geralt receives his coin directly from the King and then leaves. On the way out, he notices guards dead by the entrance. He turns around and sees an assassin cutting through the page and jumping upon the King. Geralt charges and the two engage. They're well-matched, exchanging blows and parries as they dance within the apex of the throne room. Geralt finally gets an opening and lops off the assassin's arm, following with a death blow. When he uncovers the assassin's mask, he gasps in recognition.
I'm not going to tell you what he sees because if you haven't played this game, you find out for yourself. Yes, the game has a clunky translation. But the story's background and world framework are solid and the gameplay fun and intuitive. The fact that CDProjekt is coding an upcoming patch to fix some of the voice-over and dialogue is a strong testament of their commitment to making a great game. I'm looking forward to playing the sequels.
Up next: Neverwinter Nights 2 and its expansion, the Mask of the Betrayer. I might revisit The Witcher after the patch comes out, supposedly next month, but the game is so long, I doubt I'll have the time to finish it again.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Incline Bench Report: 145
After two days off from a slave-driver work schedule, I returned to the gym this afternoon ready to move weights around for small, controlled distances. As always, I began with incline bench. After a quick warm-up, I pumped out eight reps of 115. I moved up to 135 and lifted eight no problem. At 145, I did eight, but with some effort.
So Sunday, I plan to start at 135 and range up to 155. When I get started doing reps with 165, I'll go back and check my maximum regular bench weight. I'm hoping for something in the 215 to 225 range.
So Sunday, I plan to start at 135 and range up to 155. When I get started doing reps with 165, I'll go back and check my maximum regular bench weight. I'm hoping for something in the 215 to 225 range.
Age of Conan Expansion Announced
1UP reports that Funcom announced an expansion for the Age of Conan MMO, due out sometimes in 2o09. The posted screenshot looks like a shot from the Orient which would be an interesting twist to the existing Conan landscape.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
On Deck
Since I’m nearly done with The Witcher, I’m already queuing up my next good, unfinished RPG. I got Neverwinter Nights 2 for Christmas nearly two years ago and, of course, never finished it. An expansion for the game has since come out, Mask of the Betrayer. I read it more highly praised than the original, so I picked it up on Ebay for the princely sum of $13. Including shipping! Now that’s bargain shopping.
I’m at a much slower gaming pace now that work has commenced. Sob. Last night, I collapsed into bed at ten, which is when the evening usually started in the summer. Even so, I have until late October to finish The Witcher and get as far into NW2 as possible. After that, all bets are off, as I lock my family outside of the house, pile Funyuns and Mountain Dew next to my computer, and tear into Fallout 3. You can’t see me at the moment, but I’m actually clapping my hands together. Rapidly. With glee too. Bordering on gaily.
I may need to soundproof my windows so I can’t hear Wifezilla and the two snotbags yelling to be let back in.
I’m at a much slower gaming pace now that work has commenced. Sob. Last night, I collapsed into bed at ten, which is when the evening usually started in the summer. Even so, I have until late October to finish The Witcher and get as far into NW2 as possible. After that, all bets are off, as I lock my family outside of the house, pile Funyuns and Mountain Dew next to my computer, and tear into Fallout 3. You can’t see me at the moment, but I’m actually clapping my hands together. Rapidly. With glee too. Bordering on gaily.
I may need to soundproof my windows so I can’t hear Wifezilla and the two snotbags yelling to be let back in.
Rock Out with Your Wife Out
Wifezilla and I jam together a few times a week. Yes, Rock Band. I doubt I have any better idea of what to do with a real drum kit despite my two month Rock Band expertise. Wifezilla plays a real violin, but she says that translates to a plastic guitar only so far. After hearing her play, I readily agree.
We named our band Moldy Garbage. And by “we” I mean I. To be fair, I gave Wifezilla two choices: our current name or The Sluts. So she really has no one to blame but herself for our band’s moniker. I must admit, Wifezilla pieced together a really hot rock star. She crafted long flowing auburn hair on top of a tight little package for a body. When she leaps into the air during particularly dramatic guitar solos, I frequently get distracted and fumble my sticks.
Drum sticks you filthy bastards.
Eddy, my drummer, sports blue and lime green hair. My drummer shows way more of his pelvis than I like, but he’s got a six-pack that sends the honies into convulsions. Some of the dudes too, unfortunately. He’s earned some money during his solo career, so he dons Dragonscale armor when he takes the stage, a mixture of black leather and gleaming steal, bristling with eye-gauging rivets. He’s made a practice of sacrificing a fan if he’s ever boo’d off stage. As a result, he is more often than not cheered even when he has dropped his sticks staring at his guitar player’s ass.
Last night, Wifezilla and Eddy we’re playing in Gay Paree. I don’t remember the venue’s name, but it’s the third one down since we’ve already unlocked the first two. The venue held no single song plays, just sets of three, four, and six. For the first set, Wifezilla got cocky and tried the medium setting. She crashed and burned on her solo. Eddy tried to pound the animal back into some stretched hide but he fell short of pulling them back from the brink; the crowd quickly boo’d the duo right off the stage. After Eddy got done ripping the beating heart from the chest cavity of the loudest heckler, the two retook the stage and plowed through all three songs effortlessly.
I have to confess, there’s something surreal in the realization that my wife is jamming out to the song Run to the Hills. The only people that could be more puzzled—perhaps even dismayed--would be the members of Iron Maiden themselves The entire scenario borders on the comical. She hates metal, to the point that she would leave the room if it ever seized the room’s air waves. And yet, there she was, in her bath robe and hair curlers, an unconscious sneer painted on her face, throwing the guitar’s arm into the air as she strummed titanic chords and face-melting riffs. Last night I found my wife just a tattoo away from genuine rocker.
I can’t wait to see her Billy Idol face.
We named our band Moldy Garbage. And by “we” I mean I. To be fair, I gave Wifezilla two choices: our current name or The Sluts. So she really has no one to blame but herself for our band’s moniker. I must admit, Wifezilla pieced together a really hot rock star. She crafted long flowing auburn hair on top of a tight little package for a body. When she leaps into the air during particularly dramatic guitar solos, I frequently get distracted and fumble my sticks.
Drum sticks you filthy bastards.
Eddy, my drummer, sports blue and lime green hair. My drummer shows way more of his pelvis than I like, but he’s got a six-pack that sends the honies into convulsions. Some of the dudes too, unfortunately. He’s earned some money during his solo career, so he dons Dragonscale armor when he takes the stage, a mixture of black leather and gleaming steal, bristling with eye-gauging rivets. He’s made a practice of sacrificing a fan if he’s ever boo’d off stage. As a result, he is more often than not cheered even when he has dropped his sticks staring at his guitar player’s ass.
Last night, Wifezilla and Eddy we’re playing in Gay Paree. I don’t remember the venue’s name, but it’s the third one down since we’ve already unlocked the first two. The venue held no single song plays, just sets of three, four, and six. For the first set, Wifezilla got cocky and tried the medium setting. She crashed and burned on her solo. Eddy tried to pound the animal back into some stretched hide but he fell short of pulling them back from the brink; the crowd quickly boo’d the duo right off the stage. After Eddy got done ripping the beating heart from the chest cavity of the loudest heckler, the two retook the stage and plowed through all three songs effortlessly.
I have to confess, there’s something surreal in the realization that my wife is jamming out to the song Run to the Hills. The only people that could be more puzzled—perhaps even dismayed--would be the members of Iron Maiden themselves The entire scenario borders on the comical. She hates metal, to the point that she would leave the room if it ever seized the room’s air waves. And yet, there she was, in her bath robe and hair curlers, an unconscious sneer painted on her face, throwing the guitar’s arm into the air as she strummed titanic chords and face-melting riffs. Last night I found my wife just a tattoo away from genuine rocker.
I can’t wait to see her Billy Idol face.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Fallout 3 October 28 Release
Gamespot reports that Bethesda has announced an October 28th release date for their premiere game, Fallout 3. Ebgames had the game listed for early October, so I only a bit disappointed at this announcement.
The Witcher Act V
I just hit The Witcher's Act V. It's been a road of gaming goodness paved with equal doses of cringing and rejoicing. The English translation of the games continues to put the pork product in hamming it up. It's a double whammy of cheesy actors and bad dialogue. Occasionally I'm treated to the trifecta: bad acting, enigmatic translation, and hilariously mismatched character animation.
Still, it's the truest RPG I've played all year. Even more true-blue than Mass Effect. The basic plot outline is compelling even when its mechanics fail it. And even more often than Mass Effect, The Witcher poses choices that affect the game's outcome. The most common themes, racism and individual choice versus destiny, are common fantasy fodder, but are told through a European lens and consequently seem more fresh and interesting.
The Poland based company that developed The Witcher is releasing a special edition of the game next month that fixes bugs, but more importantly, rewrites and rerecords most of the game's dialogue. It seems the company took to heart all the criticism directed at the game's biggest weakness. You can buy this new version retail, but peeps that already own the game will be able to download and patch the new content for free.
So if you haven't tried the game out yet, next month might be your best opportunity.
Still, it's the truest RPG I've played all year. Even more true-blue than Mass Effect. The basic plot outline is compelling even when its mechanics fail it. And even more often than Mass Effect, The Witcher poses choices that affect the game's outcome. The most common themes, racism and individual choice versus destiny, are common fantasy fodder, but are told through a European lens and consequently seem more fresh and interesting.
The Poland based company that developed The Witcher is releasing a special edition of the game next month that fixes bugs, but more importantly, rewrites and rerecords most of the game's dialogue. It seems the company took to heart all the criticism directed at the game's biggest weakness. You can buy this new version retail, but peeps that already own the game will be able to download and patch the new content for free.
So if you haven't tried the game out yet, next month might be your best opportunity.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Bill Roper Talks with Jeff Green
Jeff Green had an extended talk with Bill Roper, former head of Flagship Studios, their most prolific game being Hellgate: London. It's an in-depth interview, not just a few sound bites wrapped around a few fluff questions.
Of greatest interest to me is Roper's admission that he and the rest of the development team knew their subscription model was a bad idea BEFORE launch. I think this the failure among all others, dooming the game to its current state. I don't buy that it was too late for them to make a shift away from the subscription model. I mean, take a look at what you got with a subscription: an extra avatar or two, increased inventory space, hardcore play. Later on, access to Stonehenge.
That's it.
For $10 a month? No way masses of people were going to eat that $*it sandwich. I've said it before, but it's worth repeating: your game will fail if you try to charge people for things they should get for free.
In a big way, I'm glad that Hellgate: London crashed and burned. It's rotting carcass can be a reminder to future developers of what not to do when packaging and marketing their game to the public. It's a shame truly, for HG: L had solid game play at its core. If Roper and company had focused on that instead of itemizing monthly charges for extra bag space and character slots, it might have turned out differently.
Of greatest interest to me is Roper's admission that he and the rest of the development team knew their subscription model was a bad idea BEFORE launch. I think this the failure among all others, dooming the game to its current state. I don't buy that it was too late for them to make a shift away from the subscription model. I mean, take a look at what you got with a subscription: an extra avatar or two, increased inventory space, hardcore play. Later on, access to Stonehenge.
That's it.
For $10 a month? No way masses of people were going to eat that $*it sandwich. I've said it before, but it's worth repeating: your game will fail if you try to charge people for things they should get for free.
In a big way, I'm glad that Hellgate: London crashed and burned. It's rotting carcass can be a reminder to future developers of what not to do when packaging and marketing their game to the public. It's a shame truly, for HG: L had solid game play at its core. If Roper and company had focused on that instead of itemizing monthly charges for extra bag space and character slots, it might have turned out differently.
Monday, August 18, 2008
Phelps Eats Cheeseburger: News at 10
My beef isn't with Phelps. He was at a press conference and commented intimately that he'd like to eat a cheeseburger. Nothing wrong with that. I enjoy those myself. I'd probably yearn to chomp down a few myself if I had accomplished what Phelps did this past week. Unlike Phelps, I'd probably add to the mix loosening my belt and popping a top button too. Not stuff my hand down my pants. That's just weird.
No, my angst stems from the nature of today's media, the bumbling wretches always ten minutes behind the latest fad and empowered with the ability to deliver "news" on demand. Phelps likes cheeseburgers? A harmless fluff piece, right? Or a gently lobbed baseball, injected with contact-sparked napalm, hanging pregnant in the air for Joe Jerk-off to hit right out of the ball park? What a poor example he sets! Advocating junk food! A decorated Olympian athlete! Stuffing his face with fatty meats and carbs while millions of fat kids watch on! Why that no good Phelps! He's no role model! Booooooo! Hissssssss! Booooooooo!
Ack. It's times like these I wish the media would not so earnestly go about the business of demystifying our heroes. Let Phelps eat his cheeseburgers in peace I say. Really, I'd rather not know he's ingesting a tasty, processed treat from the top greasiest chain in the world. Compared to Russia lingering in Georgia like a siding-salesman in my house, it's just not newsworthy. Even a few days after he donned his eight gold medal.
I'm sure there's plenty of everyday things Phelps does that either gratify people's expectations or shock their gentle sensibilities. For certain I noticed some shaved arm pits when Phelps cheered his fellow relay pals. At the next press conference, I can do without hearing that Michael is looking forward to not shaving them for awhile. But that when he does shave them, he uses this. Shaving unsightly pubic hair! A decorated Olympian athlete! Using a pink packaged hair-removal product obviously intended for woman's use only! Why that no good Phelps! He's no role model! Booooooo! Hissssss! Booooooo!
In conclusion, Phelps doesn't use Nair. I made that up.
No, my angst stems from the nature of today's media, the bumbling wretches always ten minutes behind the latest fad and empowered with the ability to deliver "news" on demand. Phelps likes cheeseburgers? A harmless fluff piece, right? Or a gently lobbed baseball, injected with contact-sparked napalm, hanging pregnant in the air for Joe Jerk-off to hit right out of the ball park? What a poor example he sets! Advocating junk food! A decorated Olympian athlete! Stuffing his face with fatty meats and carbs while millions of fat kids watch on! Why that no good Phelps! He's no role model! Booooooo! Hissssssss! Booooooooo!
Ack. It's times like these I wish the media would not so earnestly go about the business of demystifying our heroes. Let Phelps eat his cheeseburgers in peace I say. Really, I'd rather not know he's ingesting a tasty, processed treat from the top greasiest chain in the world. Compared to Russia lingering in Georgia like a siding-salesman in my house, it's just not newsworthy. Even a few days after he donned his eight gold medal.
I'm sure there's plenty of everyday things Phelps does that either gratify people's expectations or shock their gentle sensibilities. For certain I noticed some shaved arm pits when Phelps cheered his fellow relay pals. At the next press conference, I can do without hearing that Michael is looking forward to not shaving them for awhile. But that when he does shave them, he uses this. Shaving unsightly pubic hair! A decorated Olympian athlete! Using a pink packaged hair-removal product obviously intended for woman's use only! Why that no good Phelps! He's no role model! Booooooo! Hissssss! Booooooo!
In conclusion, Phelps doesn't use Nair. I made that up.
Sunday, August 17, 2008
The Hidden Cost of Wind Energy
Weaning ourselves from carbon-based energy is not going to be an easy prospect. For a hint of the steep road ahead, read this CNN article about a small rural community in New York that is wrestling with the issues that wind-powered mills place on individuals, whole families even. The passion and ill-will in the middle of this controversy pits father against son, unbelievably enough. Imagine what the issue will do when total strangers are involved.
As we make this painful shift to solar and wind energy, more and more of us are going to have to come to grips with the attitude of "Yeah, I like the idea of solar or wind energy, but not in my backyard." Pivoting solar panels in hot desert climates and towering wind mills within the jet stream HAVE to go somewhere. You'd be hard pressed to swing a dead cat anywhere in the world and not hit some man-made construction. We live on beaches, in mountains, in fields, in deserts, along lakes, on islands. We're everywhere. It just isn't realistic to think that we're going to be able to build a new energy grid outside our sight.
At least not within the next one hundred years. Like most of technology, there's a incessant push to add power while simultaneously shrinking the package. But solar and wind gathering implements are in their infancy stage. They may shrink in years to come, but in the meantime they're going to be an eyesore. They're going to inconvenience us. Like recent high gas prices, maybe people's behavior will change in reaction. Folks will decide to move from jet stream rich countrysides where behemoth turbines spin relentlessly. Sure it's a shame their family lived there for generations and they feel an inherited right to the land. It's equally tragic that oil is running out and the world needs energy from somewhere.
The article is a great wake-up call of the pain to come.
As we make this painful shift to solar and wind energy, more and more of us are going to have to come to grips with the attitude of "Yeah, I like the idea of solar or wind energy, but not in my backyard." Pivoting solar panels in hot desert climates and towering wind mills within the jet stream HAVE to go somewhere. You'd be hard pressed to swing a dead cat anywhere in the world and not hit some man-made construction. We live on beaches, in mountains, in fields, in deserts, along lakes, on islands. We're everywhere. It just isn't realistic to think that we're going to be able to build a new energy grid outside our sight.
At least not within the next one hundred years. Like most of technology, there's a incessant push to add power while simultaneously shrinking the package. But solar and wind gathering implements are in their infancy stage. They may shrink in years to come, but in the meantime they're going to be an eyesore. They're going to inconvenience us. Like recent high gas prices, maybe people's behavior will change in reaction. Folks will decide to move from jet stream rich countrysides where behemoth turbines spin relentlessly. Sure it's a shame their family lived there for generations and they feel an inherited right to the land. It's equally tragic that oil is running out and the world needs energy from somewhere.
The article is a great wake-up call of the pain to come.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Mouseless in Houston
To give you an idea of how things roll around here at my school district, I walked into my office today to a brand new computer. Shiny. Black. LCD monitor. Three speaker sound system, sub-woofer included. New computer smell, like ozone, only more intoxicating. It was great, except for one tiny little detail:
There was no mouse or keyboard.
I looked around the building and sure enough, every new computer installed was missing a mouse and keyboard. What the hell? Who installs a computer without a mouse and keyboard? The things might as well be bricks for all the use you can get out of them mouseless and keystroke-impaired. What cracks me up is my old computer worked perfectly fine. It was old, yes, but it functioned. Why in the world they would replace a working computer with half-working one defies logic. It does jive with bureaucratic aforethought, but that doesn’t do me a whole lot of good when I’m trying to access work email or work on a database.
I asked around the building if anyone knew why mouse and keyboard didn’t arrive as standard equipment for the new shipment of computer, but no one knew anything. So I called the district’s technology department. The guy who answered immediately told me the peripherals were on their way, in a bored tone that hinted he had fielded this question many, many times in the past few days. Yeah? Well too freaking bad! Next time, install a working computer so no one’s time is wasted.
Idjits.
There was no mouse or keyboard.
I looked around the building and sure enough, every new computer installed was missing a mouse and keyboard. What the hell? Who installs a computer without a mouse and keyboard? The things might as well be bricks for all the use you can get out of them mouseless and keystroke-impaired. What cracks me up is my old computer worked perfectly fine. It was old, yes, but it functioned. Why in the world they would replace a working computer with half-working one defies logic. It does jive with bureaucratic aforethought, but that doesn’t do me a whole lot of good when I’m trying to access work email or work on a database.
I asked around the building if anyone knew why mouse and keyboard didn’t arrive as standard equipment for the new shipment of computer, but no one knew anything. So I called the district’s technology department. The guy who answered immediately told me the peripherals were on their way, in a bored tone that hinted he had fielded this question many, many times in the past few days. Yeah? Well too freaking bad! Next time, install a working computer so no one’s time is wasted.
Idjits.
Arrgghhh!
I returned to work today. Summer vacation is officially over. No more sleeping in till eight. No more laying around till nine (if you’re picturing a seal sunning itself on a rock, you’re on the right track). It’s a crying shame that I have to actually earn a living again, but waddaya gonna do? You year-round working stiffs have it easy because you don’t know what you’re missing. It’s people like me that suffer. People like me that deserve sympathy, gratitude even, for enduring a work year that involves nearly three months off. It’s a heavy burden I bear.
I just wanted you all to you that I’m taking one for the team here.
I just wanted you all to you that I’m taking one for the team here.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Sacred 2
My latest issue of PC Gamer arrived covered with an ad for Sacred 2. I played Sacred many moons ago and enjoyed it immensely. It's an European Diablo clone with a bit more emphasis on story and questing than the Blizzard product.
What's funny is that I've heard absolutely zero buzz about the game and the ad announces it's due to hit retail next month. I didn't even know it was in production until today let alone imminently arriving on store shelves. E3 went down just a few weeks ago and neither G4, XPlay, or any of the gaming sites made any mention of Sacred 2. So what gives?
It could be that since it's a European game, it's been heavily covered across the pond but completely ignored here in the states. Ascaron Entertainment is developing the game, across multiple platforms I might add, and perhaps the fact that they're a German company somehow hindered pre-marketing the game outside the European venue.
Another scenario, less likely, is that the game stinks and American previewers found it not worth their time to hype. Sacred was such a solid title, I doubt seriously its sequel will prove worse in terms of playability and value.
In any case, look for Sacred 2 to hit retail sometime in September. I found it ominous that Ebgames didn't have it listed as a September release, but maybe that's because they didn't order any shipments. You might have to hit GoGamer.com for this title (though they don't have it listed either).
What's funny is that I've heard absolutely zero buzz about the game and the ad announces it's due to hit retail next month. I didn't even know it was in production until today let alone imminently arriving on store shelves. E3 went down just a few weeks ago and neither G4, XPlay, or any of the gaming sites made any mention of Sacred 2. So what gives?
It could be that since it's a European game, it's been heavily covered across the pond but completely ignored here in the states. Ascaron Entertainment is developing the game, across multiple platforms I might add, and perhaps the fact that they're a German company somehow hindered pre-marketing the game outside the European venue.
Another scenario, less likely, is that the game stinks and American previewers found it not worth their time to hype. Sacred was such a solid title, I doubt seriously its sequel will prove worse in terms of playability and value.
In any case, look for Sacred 2 to hit retail sometime in September. I found it ominous that Ebgames didn't have it listed as a September release, but maybe that's because they didn't order any shipments. You might have to hit GoGamer.com for this title (though they don't have it listed either).
Gamespot Has a New Look
You can see it here. I vowed to stop reading Gamespot after the whole Gerstmann debacle, but the truth is, 1UP is an inferior substitute. It's poorly designed and not updated as often or thoroughly as Gamespot. I know that the Games for Windows magazine went belly up and that Jeff Green and company were switched over to an online version of the publication at 1UP. But the transition has not gone smoothly as Green's blog and editorial entries are sporadic at best and the vaunted redesign has yet to appear.
Gamespot, on the other hand, looks and navigates much better. Unfortunately, it's still not clear how much their management bends to the will of advertising companies. Just goes to show, in video gaming, you either take disorganized independence or well-designed shilling.
Gamespot, on the other hand, looks and navigates much better. Unfortunately, it's still not clear how much their management bends to the will of advertising companies. Just goes to show, in video gaming, you either take disorganized independence or well-designed shilling.
Incline Bench Press Unless . . .
When I strode into the gym today, I found some tool already "lifting" on my incline bench. Yes, mine. I made it clear to the gym owners that all gym equipment I use must be abandoned upon my entering the facilities. So I'll be having a talk with the manager later.
Since I couldn't start with incline, I loaded up a regular bench press. I've been focusing my free weight chest exercise exclusively with incline, so I haven't done regular bench since restarting my new regimen. I started with 135 and lifted it easily so I moved up to 155. I managed eight reps, though not effortlessly. Intrigued, I bumped up to 185. I did three reps, though I could have squeezed out more if I had a spotter. After that, the poser abandoned the incline press like he should have done when I first entered so I switched to that.
So that's pretty good progress. With a bit more iron pumping, I should be back to doing full reps with 185, which would in turn put my max at 210 plus. In the meantime though, I'm going to continue favoring incline over regular, at least until I'm happy with my upper chest and shoulder region.
Since I couldn't start with incline, I loaded up a regular bench press. I've been focusing my free weight chest exercise exclusively with incline, so I haven't done regular bench since restarting my new regimen. I started with 135 and lifted it easily so I moved up to 155. I managed eight reps, though not effortlessly. Intrigued, I bumped up to 185. I did three reps, though I could have squeezed out more if I had a spotter. After that, the poser abandoned the incline press like he should have done when I first entered so I switched to that.
So that's pretty good progress. With a bit more iron pumping, I should be back to doing full reps with 185, which would in turn put my max at 210 plus. In the meantime though, I'm going to continue favoring incline over regular, at least until I'm happy with my upper chest and shoulder region.
T&A, Dwarf Anatomy, and Today's RPG's
I'm well into The Witcher's Act III and am in role playing heaven. Just today I helped the elves and dwarves escape capture after they robbed Vizima's local bank. The game's demihumans are a racially persecuted lot and currently wage a guerrilla war against the humans. I also tracked down a knight's sister. She had been bitten by a madame vampire and was currently turning tricks at the local whorehouse. It was only after I tapped some of that action that I noticed the bite marks, so my carousing had an investigative purpose even if I stumbled upon the clue completely by accident. The best part: after I informed the knight that his sister was a vampire prostitute, the dude freaked out on me, stiffed me my reward, and stormed out of the inn.
Speaking of inns, they're inevitably populated with patrons that inform me that my Ma sucks dwarf . . . well, you know. This incenses Geralt to be sure, but the game only allows him to pummel the foul-mouthed offenders of his Ma's honor; I don't have the option to unsheathe cold steel to permanently end the jibes. Beating the crap out of mouthy citizens gets tiring, however. Geralt relaxes by hard drinking and equally hard skirt chasing. As a result, my collection of nekkid cards continues to grow. I play Geralt to hit anything that's 1) female and 2) hawt. He's been mostly successful except for the butt-nekkid green dryad who wanted Geralt to procure a wolf pelt to prove his virility. I had not one on hand so there was no hot woodland creature action to be had.
I do appreciate this new generation of RPG. Games like Mass Effect, The Witcher, and Grand Theft Auto IV are designed and marketed for adults. Now that I've played them, I can't believe adult gamers went so long without such games. It's easy to look back and see why. Financially, developers couldn't afford to risk designing a game for a single strata of gamer. Instead, they designed for the lowest common denominator. Good games still came together, but any content aimed at adults also had to be appropriate for the youngsters.
Which is a real shame for the very reason that a stark difference exists between an adult movie like The Departed and a children's movie like Kung Fu Panda. I like both movies, but one is a more satisfying experience than the other. It's taken awhile, but video gaming is finally catching up to the mature gaming market, recognizing that adults don't want their games watered down, homogenized for the broadest audience possible. Games like the The Witcher could hearken a new golden age of gaming, where avatars insult your mother's virtue and gratuitous nudity is as prolific as monster killing.
Speaking of inns, they're inevitably populated with patrons that inform me that my Ma sucks dwarf . . . well, you know. This incenses Geralt to be sure, but the game only allows him to pummel the foul-mouthed offenders of his Ma's honor; I don't have the option to unsheathe cold steel to permanently end the jibes. Beating the crap out of mouthy citizens gets tiring, however. Geralt relaxes by hard drinking and equally hard skirt chasing. As a result, my collection of nekkid cards continues to grow. I play Geralt to hit anything that's 1) female and 2) hawt. He's been mostly successful except for the butt-nekkid green dryad who wanted Geralt to procure a wolf pelt to prove his virility. I had not one on hand so there was no hot woodland creature action to be had.
I do appreciate this new generation of RPG. Games like Mass Effect, The Witcher, and Grand Theft Auto IV are designed and marketed for adults. Now that I've played them, I can't believe adult gamers went so long without such games. It's easy to look back and see why. Financially, developers couldn't afford to risk designing a game for a single strata of gamer. Instead, they designed for the lowest common denominator. Good games still came together, but any content aimed at adults also had to be appropriate for the youngsters.
Which is a real shame for the very reason that a stark difference exists between an adult movie like The Departed and a children's movie like Kung Fu Panda. I like both movies, but one is a more satisfying experience than the other. It's taken awhile, but video gaming is finally catching up to the mature gaming market, recognizing that adults don't want their games watered down, homogenized for the broadest audience possible. Games like the The Witcher could hearken a new golden age of gaming, where avatars insult your mother's virtue and gratuitous nudity is as prolific as monster killing.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
U.S. Women's Gymanstics Team
I have to take back what I wrote yesterday. When the women faltered during last night's competition, they handled themselves like the Olympic athletes they are. After making mistakes (some bigger than others), they calmly made their way to the side and stood observing. Thinking. Replaying the mistakes over again to be sure. Probably trying to block it all out in preparation for the next event too. It was disappointing to see Alicia Sacramone fall off the balance beam immediately following her backwards mounting maneuver. It was equally inspiring to see her get right back on and finish the routine.
You can see Alicia Sacramone here talking about her pivotal fall during the balance beam.
Phelps continues to amaze. I watched him swim the first leg of the 200 meter relay and the dude piled up a massive lead for his peer swimmers. I don't know how that guy can swim multiple events in the same night, and win gold too. It must be discouraging to swim against him, knowing your only realistic shot is at silver or bronze.
I want to give China their props too. People might not like Bejing's smog or the country's politics. But China built some beautiful Olympic facilities, events seem to be running like clockwork, and the general atmosphere strikes me as relaxed and conducive to international competition. The games have definitely shown the world a side of China they wouldn't normally have the opportunity to see.
Which is the entire purpose of the games to begin with.
You can see Alicia Sacramone here talking about her pivotal fall during the balance beam.
Phelps continues to amaze. I watched him swim the first leg of the 200 meter relay and the dude piled up a massive lead for his peer swimmers. I don't know how that guy can swim multiple events in the same night, and win gold too. It must be discouraging to swim against him, knowing your only realistic shot is at silver or bronze.
I want to give China their props too. People might not like Bejing's smog or the country's politics. But China built some beautiful Olympic facilities, events seem to be running like clockwork, and the general atmosphere strikes me as relaxed and conducive to international competition. The games have definitely shown the world a side of China they wouldn't normally have the opportunity to see.
Which is the entire purpose of the games to begin with.
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
Manastics
I don't usually watch the Olympics. Especially gymnastics. Most especially men doing gymnastics. But last night, I somehow got sucked into watching short, muscular boys gyrate on flexing poles and rigid bars. I blame Wifezilla since she enjoys Olympic spectating and cajoled me into watching with her.
Still, those bouncing and contorting men gymnasts have some skillz. I was especially impressed with the ring and high bar events. The rings involve lifting, twisting, and turning the body mostly through arm and upper body strength. I caught the Chinese gymnasts at this and was blown away with the raw strength the exhibited. The high bar too, raw power combined with intense concentration. Every time they let go of the bar to twist or somersault, I heard my breath catch. Good stuff even if it is a bit, uh, fruity. The American team came away with a bronze medal, finishing much higher than anyone had predicated.
I saw women gymnastics a couple of days before and was struck how frail and delicate they seemed. I don't mean just physically. One American screwed up her floor routine. She left the floor with tears in her eyes, only to be hugged and consoled over and over again by fellow teammates and coaches. I wondered if that was standard routine pampering or just a result of Olympic competition. Either way, I found it nauseating and commanded the TV camera to pan elsewhere to spare me the spectacle.
The dude gymnasts were waaaay cooler. They screwed up as often as the female counterparts, but took the failure with stoic silence. They'd come off the floor, exchange half-hearted high-fives, and then watch the next competitor. The women could learn from that.
We watched Phelps win two medals last night. That dude swam both events within an hour of each other which is completely mind-bottling; he had twenty minutes before his second event as he stood on the Olympic podium receiving his second gold medal. The United States is so strong in swimming, but the other swimmers are overshadowed by Phelps. I plan on tuning in tonight to watch more of Phelps.
Still, those bouncing and contorting men gymnasts have some skillz. I was especially impressed with the ring and high bar events. The rings involve lifting, twisting, and turning the body mostly through arm and upper body strength. I caught the Chinese gymnasts at this and was blown away with the raw strength the exhibited. The high bar too, raw power combined with intense concentration. Every time they let go of the bar to twist or somersault, I heard my breath catch. Good stuff even if it is a bit, uh, fruity. The American team came away with a bronze medal, finishing much higher than anyone had predicated.
I saw women gymnastics a couple of days before and was struck how frail and delicate they seemed. I don't mean just physically. One American screwed up her floor routine. She left the floor with tears in her eyes, only to be hugged and consoled over and over again by fellow teammates and coaches. I wondered if that was standard routine pampering or just a result of Olympic competition. Either way, I found it nauseating and commanded the TV camera to pan elsewhere to spare me the spectacle.
The dude gymnasts were waaaay cooler. They screwed up as often as the female counterparts, but took the failure with stoic silence. They'd come off the floor, exchange half-hearted high-fives, and then watch the next competitor. The women could learn from that.
We watched Phelps win two medals last night. That dude swam both events within an hour of each other which is completely mind-bottling; he had twenty minutes before his second event as he stood on the Olympic podium receiving his second gold medal. The United States is so strong in swimming, but the other swimmers are overshadowed by Phelps. I plan on tuning in tonight to watch more of Phelps.
Monday, August 11, 2008
But You Can Beat It to the Movie, Right?
Watch this video for a decent summary of the media battle between Hollywood and video games. Keep watching to the very end for a hilarious cap off.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Shivering Isles Finished
This afternoon I plowed through the rest of the Shivering Isles, the expansion to the outstanding Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion.
Great story, even better ending. At the very end, after defeating Jyggalag, the Lord of Order, I inherited the throne of the Shivering Isles. Seems Sheogorath was the physical incarnation of both himself and Jyggalag and that once the Greymarch began, he transitioned over to Jyggalag, bent on wiping out the Shivering Isles.
I faced off with Jyggalag in the Palace Gardens. He appeared in a blue burst of energy, a Knight of Order on a much grander scale. Afterwards, I officially took over for Sheogorath as the ruler of the Shivering Isles. Throne, raiment, guards, the whole thing. Plus, I can now change the lands weather once per day, summon myself back to the throne room, request an honor guard accompany me, and order up some entertainment.
All in all, a great game. It makes me sad that there won't be any more expansions for such a quality game, but between the the two titles, I'm sure I've logged more than hundred hours of gaming goodness.
So, now it's on to finishing The Witcher. I'm totally digging my push to finish the unfinished. I should get The Witcher done just in time for that new crop of games coming out this fall.
Great story, even better ending. At the very end, after defeating Jyggalag, the Lord of Order, I inherited the throne of the Shivering Isles. Seems Sheogorath was the physical incarnation of both himself and Jyggalag and that once the Greymarch began, he transitioned over to Jyggalag, bent on wiping out the Shivering Isles.
I faced off with Jyggalag in the Palace Gardens. He appeared in a blue burst of energy, a Knight of Order on a much grander scale. Afterwards, I officially took over for Sheogorath as the ruler of the Shivering Isles. Throne, raiment, guards, the whole thing. Plus, I can now change the lands weather once per day, summon myself back to the throne room, request an honor guard accompany me, and order up some entertainment.
All in all, a great game. It makes me sad that there won't be any more expansions for such a quality game, but between the the two titles, I'm sure I've logged more than hundred hours of gaming goodness.
So, now it's on to finishing The Witcher. I'm totally digging my push to finish the unfinished. I should get The Witcher done just in time for that new crop of games coming out this fall.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Command & Conquer 3: Croatia
I experience bouts of misguided gaming aspiration. I fondly remember playing Red Alert 2 and Warcraft II, forgetting that I suck at RTSs. Temporary insanity made me purchase last year's Command & Conquer 3, an otherwise outstanding RTS but for the fact that I only made it through the first half of the GDI campaign before shelving it. In mute frustration.
I like balancing gaming genres and though I'm making solid headway in Shivering Isles, I got the yen to tackle C&C 3 once more. I've already mentioned the problem inherent in me playing an RTS; firing up C&C 3 had me face to face with the GDI campaign mission 8, Croatia once more. A year ago I was waves upon its rocky shores, battering myself again and again, defeat after defeat.
But not this time! In the middle of my house, in full view of my scared family, I rebel yelled "For Croatia!" and proceeded to once again methodically puzzle out the inappropriately difficult scenario.
I say inappropriate because the game misleads. It lays a bread of bread crumbs for Hansel to follow to his RTS death. If you've ever played C&C 3, you know the campaign missions have yellow primary objectives. They're ordered too: 1, 2, 3, etc. Most of the time, you have to complete them in numerical order. But not always. And therein is the key to Croatia, as divulged by the kind soul that wrote this guide. God bless him.
His tip on how to build a defense worked perfectly. I had been building infantry, digging them in west and south. They always got the crap kicked out of them. Grawl ignores bunkers, instead building four APCs and loading an infantry unit in each one. Two to west, two to the south, and Nod never made it within throwing distance of my base walls.
Powering up both vehicle turrets on north and east worked great too. But I had been under-supplanting my tanks. I had only been using one or two for both flanks. Grawl said three for each and once again I watched as wave after wave of Nod vehicles exploded before my walls.
Once I lasted the requisite three minutes, the game added a mission: rescuing the MCV well north of my base. And across the bridge. The game never ceases chirping out reminders to rescue and escort the MCV back to your base. And this how it misleads you. If you go ahead and rescue the MCV when the computer orders, Nod continues assaulting all four flanks of your base. It's almost impossible to micromanage the MCV escort AND you base's defense. Well, impossible for me at least. Compounding the problem, Nod researches its tech tree with zeal; once you start seeing the flaming throwing tanks rolling into your base, it's game over.
But Grawl has the answer. He says ignore the mission order, and build up a tank fleet, no fewer than twelve Predators. Take them north, northeast and wipe out the base that's sending the endless vehicle waves. Once that's gone, two of your flanks become safe enough for playground equipment. I mean, you can hear crickets. It's a beautiful thing.
After that, the mission opens wide. Escorting the MCV back to base is a cakewalk. The only thing left is to expand your base, research your tech tree, and destroy the remaining two Nod bases. I used wave after wave of Orcas, but jumping shock troopers work as well.
I'm thrilled to be through Croatia. However, I felt mission 8 ill-placed in the GDI campaign because I tore through mission 9 immediately after, first time through. Mission 8 is a difficult roadblock that hampers many gamers if the boards are to be believed. I would have placed it later in the campaign or tweaked the Nod vehicle assault. Maybe they deliberately made the mission hard in the middle of the campaign, a sort of skillz check to weed out the RTS challenged.
All I know is Remember Croatia!
I like balancing gaming genres and though I'm making solid headway in Shivering Isles, I got the yen to tackle C&C 3 once more. I've already mentioned the problem inherent in me playing an RTS; firing up C&C 3 had me face to face with the GDI campaign mission 8, Croatia once more. A year ago I was waves upon its rocky shores, battering myself again and again, defeat after defeat.
But not this time! In the middle of my house, in full view of my scared family, I rebel yelled "For Croatia!" and proceeded to once again methodically puzzle out the inappropriately difficult scenario.
I say inappropriate because the game misleads. It lays a bread of bread crumbs for Hansel to follow to his RTS death. If you've ever played C&C 3, you know the campaign missions have yellow primary objectives. They're ordered too: 1, 2, 3, etc. Most of the time, you have to complete them in numerical order. But not always. And therein is the key to Croatia, as divulged by the kind soul that wrote this guide. God bless him.
His tip on how to build a defense worked perfectly. I had been building infantry, digging them in west and south. They always got the crap kicked out of them. Grawl ignores bunkers, instead building four APCs and loading an infantry unit in each one. Two to west, two to the south, and Nod never made it within throwing distance of my base walls.
Powering up both vehicle turrets on north and east worked great too. But I had been under-supplanting my tanks. I had only been using one or two for both flanks. Grawl said three for each and once again I watched as wave after wave of Nod vehicles exploded before my walls.
Once I lasted the requisite three minutes, the game added a mission: rescuing the MCV well north of my base. And across the bridge. The game never ceases chirping out reminders to rescue and escort the MCV back to your base. And this how it misleads you. If you go ahead and rescue the MCV when the computer orders, Nod continues assaulting all four flanks of your base. It's almost impossible to micromanage the MCV escort AND you base's defense. Well, impossible for me at least. Compounding the problem, Nod researches its tech tree with zeal; once you start seeing the flaming throwing tanks rolling into your base, it's game over.
But Grawl has the answer. He says ignore the mission order, and build up a tank fleet, no fewer than twelve Predators. Take them north, northeast and wipe out the base that's sending the endless vehicle waves. Once that's gone, two of your flanks become safe enough for playground equipment. I mean, you can hear crickets. It's a beautiful thing.
After that, the mission opens wide. Escorting the MCV back to base is a cakewalk. The only thing left is to expand your base, research your tech tree, and destroy the remaining two Nod bases. I used wave after wave of Orcas, but jumping shock troopers work as well.
I'm thrilled to be through Croatia. However, I felt mission 8 ill-placed in the GDI campaign because I tore through mission 9 immediately after, first time through. Mission 8 is a difficult roadblock that hampers many gamers if the boards are to be believed. I would have placed it later in the campaign or tweaked the Nod vehicle assault. Maybe they deliberately made the mission hard in the middle of the campaign, a sort of skillz check to weed out the RTS challenged.
All I know is Remember Croatia!
Friday, August 8, 2008
Some MMO Tidbits
The Warhammer MMO comes out in the middle of September. I know next to nothing about it, but the little of the game play video I've seen does little to distinguish itself from the well-represented fantasy MMO crowd. I don't see this game surpassing Age of Conan sales; AoC may not have been a revolution in MMO play, but it did offer some interesting twists, limb and head lopping prime among them. But I haven't heard anything remotely innovative coming from Warhammer. In fact, I recently read a report that the developers had to scale back the breadth of the content, including removing entire cities.
Xplay reported Blizzard is going a step further in getting current players to recruit their friends. In addition to the standard thirty free days of play for getting a friend to sign up, World of Warcraft also offers players the option to give a friend a free level. In addition, newly recruited friends earn three times the xp when grouped with their recruiter. Those are some interesting carrots that Blizzard is dangling. I'll be interested to see to what other lengths they'll go to retain their current subscriber base.
Xplay reported Blizzard is going a step further in getting current players to recruit their friends. In addition to the standard thirty free days of play for getting a friend to sign up, World of Warcraft also offers players the option to give a friend a free level. In addition, newly recruited friends earn three times the xp when grouped with their recruiter. Those are some interesting carrots that Blizzard is dangling. I'll be interested to see to what other lengths they'll go to retain their current subscriber base.
Diablo III Bows to Pressure?
Gamespot reports that Brian Morrisroe resigned as chief art director for Diablo III and that Blizzard posted the job opening on its website. The company claims that Brian left on his own to pursue another career option. But the fact that the resignation comes in the midst of the 50,000 fan petition demanding Blizzard darken the game's art design is highly suspicious. Morrisroe's departure reminds me of an embattled public official who holds a resignation press conference stating he's stepping down to spend more time with his family.
My guess is Blizzard canned Brian under withering forum fan-boy criticism, a subtle concession to the vocal masses. I also guess that if they could redo the art design, they would. But they can't. At least, not without starting completely over. That's the clincher, the niggling detail that prompts the game's lead designer to sidestep all the angst and furor when he says on record, "There's no going back now." Not without delaying the game another year and spending millions more.
Besides I can almost guarantee all those petitioners buy the game anyway, even if they have to stab their eyes out to play it.
My guess is Blizzard canned Brian under withering forum fan-boy criticism, a subtle concession to the vocal masses. I also guess that if they could redo the art design, they would. But they can't. At least, not without starting completely over. That's the clincher, the niggling detail that prompts the game's lead designer to sidestep all the angst and furor when he says on record, "There's no going back now." Not without delaying the game another year and spending millions more.
Besides I can almost guarantee all those petitioners buy the game anyway, even if they have to stab their eyes out to play it.
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Grand Theft Auto IV Confirmed for PC
1up reports that GTA IV will arrive for the PC November 18. That's this year!
I borrowed the 360 version from my brother, but as I wrote a few days ago, I'm all thumbs with the controller. So I shall be snagging this game for PC.
I wish some of these titles were coming out now. With Fallout 3 slated for a October release, GTA IV the following month, as usual I'll have more gaming than time. A good problem to be sure, but a problem nevertheless.
I borrowed the 360 version from my brother, but as I wrote a few days ago, I'm all thumbs with the controller. So I shall be snagging this game for PC.
I wish some of these titles were coming out now. With Fallout 3 slated for a October release, GTA IV the following month, as usual I'll have more gaming than time. A good problem to be sure, but a problem nevertheless.
Dungeons & Dragons 4.0 and the RP Debate
I started playing D&D again. I glanced at the new rules, liked what I saw, called up my old pals to see if they were still playing, and am now back in the game. More about that later.
I see the MMO class roles as a game play innovation, even if it is a refinement of what Gygax and Arneson started with Chainmail back in the day. The D&D community can resent the influence till the beholders come home, but MMOs borrowed from D&D and then they turned around and evolved it. To quote a platitude, imitation is the highest form of flattery. D&D can only benefit from taking a look at what MMOs (and other computer games too) do well, steal that, and then roll a d20 to see if they pulled it off.
I'm most interested in the current heated debate regarding the new 4.0 release and whether it discourages roleplaying in favor of Warhammer-like tactical combats. Desslock summarized one side of the debate in his PC Gamer column in the September issue. Comparing 3.0 to 4.0, Desslock writes, "The D&D 4.0 rules strive to make the game more accessible, but often at the cost of removing character customization and roleplaying options. Players no longer have to carefully consider which class or skills to select, because skills now automatically advance and classes are now more balanced and useful in any situation. As a result, character are more likely to artificially resemble each other instead of personalized alter-egos." Desslock addresses two issues here, that 4.0 changed class roles (for the worst) and made roleplaying harder.
The issue of roleplaying first: Desslock, if you're relying on rule sets to roleplay, you're doing it wrong. Take all the rules and the dice and the checkered game boards out of D&D, what do you have left? Theater! Without the laws governing the limits of what people can do with their character, imagination takes precedent and amateur acting or MacGyver problem-solving take center stage. The line cuts finely between Doritos chomping geek and gesticulating thespian. And D&D with no rules is a close relative of the community college acting workshop.
The fact of the matter is, roleplaying has always operated outside a rule set, even back in the first edition days. The rules exists to ground the game in a certain reality, like how far can I run in six seconds, can I break down that door, or can I scale that wall. But roleplaying has always encompassed those rare (the games I play are combat heavy) moments of the gaming session where improvisation kicks in and stars are born. Roleplaying is the chance to prove to the rest of the table that your character is more than just the statistics on a page and that you can manipulate the world around you with clever dialogue, a cultural or racial idiosyncrasy, or a novel approach to a stubborn obstacle. Those game facets operate outside any ruleset. D&D 4.0 didn't ruin those opportunities anymore than 3.5 improved them. So if roleplaying suffers in modern D&D, inspired players need to look to themselves or their DM if they want to improve (or begin) that part of their game.
As for the class roles, I again disagree with Desslock. It didn't help that at the end of his column, he declared Fallout a better RPG than Diablo. First, that's like saying New York strip tastes better than yak vomit. Second, Diablo isn't a RPG. Desslock might as well declare Fallout a better RPG than Call of Duty 4 because his first comparison is nearly as silly. Though fertile ground for another blog another day, I would go so far as to say WoW and its peers are as much RPGs as Diablo.
I do agree that the 4.0 classes seemed more balanced now, overall power wise. 3.5 suffered awfully from leveling scale. The game played fine at lower levels, but as characters leveled past the teens, certain classes became impotent while others grew into tremendous (fire)powerhouses. Fighters especially suffered. Their AC and hit points didn't keep up with the attack rolls and damage directed at them. Playing a high level fighter in 3.5 boiled down to going toe-to-two for a few rounds before a saving throw was missed or a couple of monster blows landed. A chew toy distraction at best.
I suspect 4.0 is going to scale much better. The leveling upgrades are written directly into the skills themselves. And I count the designers behind 4.0 as wise men for borrowing and incorporating the MMO model into their combat system. Tank, DPS, and healing are the fundamental class roles; crowd control, aggro control, healing, dps the means of resolving the combat. When you edit the 3.5 fighter, giving him aggro grabbing and and interrupt abilities, you create a more focused class, a more focused class role, and a more satisfying combat experience. He might still be a chew toy at times, but at least he's getting something done in the process besides distracting that umber hulk for two rounds.
Desslock doesn't like the new MMO influence. That's fine, but he's got his horse and cart mixed up when he writes, "D&D 4.0 needlessly imports MMO game play conventions and terminology, which is ironic, since many MMO mechanics originated as necessary compromises when it was impossible to re-create the more open-ended game play of tabletop RPGs."
Needless, ironic import? I guess you could view it that way. Another way would be to see today's MMOs refining RPG combat, not just because it works better in a computer game but because empirically it's an improvement. I don't have hard numbers, but within WoW's 10 million subscriber base, surely some of those are ex-tabletop RPGers, D&D included. With their consumer base shifting over to MMOs, it's not surprising to see Wizards of the Coast dissecting their appeal and then grafting appealing elements into the next iteration of their game.I see the MMO class roles as a game play innovation, even if it is a refinement of what Gygax and Arneson started with Chainmail back in the day. The D&D community can resent the influence till the beholders come home, but MMOs borrowed from D&D and then they turned around and evolved it. To quote a platitude, imitation is the highest form of flattery. D&D can only benefit from taking a look at what MMOs (and other computer games too) do well, steal that, and then roll a d20 to see if they pulled it off.
The good news here is that if you agree with Desslock, you can continue playing the more "roleplay" friendly 3.5 rules. Personally, I think it behooves the player base to support the latest version of D&D if it's well-designed and fun. Which 4.0 is. If they don't . . . well, Wizards is a business and it's not beyond the pale light of forecasting to see a day when they abandon D&D altogether.
Leaving naught but leviathan MMOs ruling the world.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
I, Arch-Mage
I became Arch-mage of the mage guild yesterday in Oblivion. It was a great story arch, involving a plot by the region's necromancer cult to take over the mage guild for nefarious purpose to be sure. The story ended with dramatic confrontation, me against the fiend Mannimarco, the King of Worms. It was an epic struggle involving multiple conjurations and fireballs, but I ultimately prevailed. I returned to Imperial City triumphant and, more importantly, the new Arch-mage of Cyrodiil.
Poking around the wiki for Oblivion, I stumbled upon a great collection of mods for the game. It's commonly agreed that a major failing of Oblivion is that the land's monster population scales with the player's level rather than remaining static. The designers defend this feature, citing the player's ability to visit any part of the game no matter how low or high their level. But few players like the design choice and quite a few mods exist that change that scaling by repopulating the game's landscape and dungeons with a variety of leveled mobs.
When I finish "vanilla" Shivering Isles (the game played without mods), I may just roll a new toon and give some of these mods a try.
Poking around the wiki for Oblivion, I stumbled upon a great collection of mods for the game. It's commonly agreed that a major failing of Oblivion is that the land's monster population scales with the player's level rather than remaining static. The designers defend this feature, citing the player's ability to visit any part of the game no matter how low or high their level. But few players like the design choice and quite a few mods exist that change that scaling by repopulating the game's landscape and dungeons with a variety of leveled mobs.
When I finish "vanilla" Shivering Isles (the game played without mods), I may just roll a new toon and give some of these mods a try.
T.S. Edouard Goes East of Me
Tropical storm Edouard dissolved briefly in the Gulf and then reformed, changing its projected path. As a result, it landed and tracked east of Houston rather than west. Which is bad news for someone but good for my family and myself. We've had light to moderate rain all day, a blessing from the weeks of no moisture.
Monday, August 4, 2008
Tropical Storm Edouard
A tropical storm, likely soon-to-be hurricane, currently storms its way slowly towards the Houston metro area as I write this. I've lived in Houston almost ten years and have never experienced a direct hit from a hurricane or tropical storm. Hurricane Rita doesn't count because we fled to Dallas and it veered to the east anyways.
I'm not explicitly worried. The brightly colored weather graphics from the local news show around 40 mph winds where I live. It's the flooding that could be problematic, though my suburb has excellent flood control. Tornadoes spawning from the main storm could also prove troublesome, but worrying about that is like fretting about getting struck by lightning or winning the lottery.
At the very least it should make for some exciting weather hereabouts. I just hope it's fun exciting and not the other kind.
I'm not explicitly worried. The brightly colored weather graphics from the local news show around 40 mph winds where I live. It's the flooding that could be problematic, though my suburb has excellent flood control. Tornadoes spawning from the main storm could also prove troublesome, but worrying about that is like fretting about getting struck by lightning or winning the lottery.
At the very least it should make for some exciting weather hereabouts. I just hope it's fun exciting and not the other kind.
Fallout 4?
1up reports that Bethesda is hinting that they will develop a Fallout 4. Yes, yes, they should get 3 out the door before talking about a fourth. Still, this is good news. Except if you consider an Elder Scrolls V. I'd really like to see another addition to this series, especially so after revisiting Oblivion and the Shivering Isles. I doubt Bethesda could pull off two in-depth RPGs at the same time.
But who knows? Bethesda equals Blizzard and Bioware in my eyes. It'd be great to see them push themselves, but only if quality remained high.
But who knows? Bethesda equals Blizzard and Bioware in my eyes. It'd be great to see them push themselves, but only if quality remained high.
LittleBigHype
It's the darling of the press and the reporters on G4, Adam Sessler and Morgan Webb, especially adore it. But I don't see any game play in LittleBigPlanet. The game's website does little to shed any light on what makes this a game. It says, "LittleBigPlanet is a unique game combining an amazing platform adventure with a huge social community enabling consumers to play, create and share their gaming."
That's about as clear as mud.
I wouldn't normally give a rat's ass about game like this if it weren't for the fact that people are ravenously anticipating it. I look at the video game play and ask myself, "Sweet Jesus, WHY?" Awww, but look, the little avatars are so cute! Uh huh. Unless another side of the game produces the ability to rocket-explode those cute little avatars into tiny, bloody, meaty pieces, than I want nothing to do with it.
And by the way, Spore's ability to "create and share their gaming" led to an explosion of penis themed creatures. Some merely hinted the phallic. Others eschewed the subtle and told the world, "I made a creature and it has penises. See?" And still others were so covered in penises, it was the equivalent of having one whack you in the face.
For some of us, that's not good.
That's about as clear as mud.
I wouldn't normally give a rat's ass about game like this if it weren't for the fact that people are ravenously anticipating it. I look at the video game play and ask myself, "Sweet Jesus, WHY?" Awww, but look, the little avatars are so cute! Uh huh. Unless another side of the game produces the ability to rocket-explode those cute little avatars into tiny, bloody, meaty pieces, than I want nothing to do with it.
And by the way, Spore's ability to "create and share their gaming" led to an explosion of penis themed creatures. Some merely hinted the phallic. Others eschewed the subtle and told the world, "I made a creature and it has penises. See?" And still others were so covered in penises, it was the equivalent of having one whack you in the face.
For some of us, that's not good.
Too Human Demo
I bought a Xbox 360 for Rock Band. I'm a PC man until the day the format ceases to exist. Which is predicted every year by some gaming pundit trying to make a name for himself. The PC apocalypse never seems to materialize. If anything thing, the more pundits that predict it, the better the PC industry does that year.
As a PC gamer, I'm adept at mouse and keyboard. Don't get me wrong; I don't tear it up on shooters, even on the PC. But the control scheme is second nature to me, so much so that I can pick up just about any game on the PC and immediately start playing it reasonably well.
The Xbox controller? Not so much.
Even so, I've heard some hype about the upcoming Xbox exclusive title, Too Human. It's billed as an action/RPG, the same description as the Diablo series, so I decided to download it and give it a spin. Suffice it to say, my clumsiness with the controller impedes my ability to judge the game. I imagine I looked like a monkey trying to use a TV remote and not getting the channel he wanted. The Discovery Channel, I'm sure.
I think I did make it to the end of the demo. I made it to a boss, at least. Skullcrusher was his name. He reminded me a bit of Void Reaver, though a raiding party at my back was conspicuously absent. I got Skull down to half health, but after that my sword blows were damageless. After I died a couple of times, I tried some new strategies. One in particular, running behind the steaming machine and jumping, proved the right track. A tiny cut scene depicted me jumping on top of Skull's head; I looked like a was riding a mechanical bull. But when I started to mash some buttons in an ignorant attempt to spring an attack, I slid off harmlessly instead. I eventually got bored and quit.
The game shows promise though. I doubt it's anything I'll pick up. About the only Xbox game I'm thinking of purchasing outside of Rock Band 2 is The Force Unleashed. And even then I'm going to wait for some reviews first.
As a PC gamer, I'm adept at mouse and keyboard. Don't get me wrong; I don't tear it up on shooters, even on the PC. But the control scheme is second nature to me, so much so that I can pick up just about any game on the PC and immediately start playing it reasonably well.
The Xbox controller? Not so much.
Even so, I've heard some hype about the upcoming Xbox exclusive title, Too Human. It's billed as an action/RPG, the same description as the Diablo series, so I decided to download it and give it a spin. Suffice it to say, my clumsiness with the controller impedes my ability to judge the game. I imagine I looked like a monkey trying to use a TV remote and not getting the channel he wanted. The Discovery Channel, I'm sure.
I think I did make it to the end of the demo. I made it to a boss, at least. Skullcrusher was his name. He reminded me a bit of Void Reaver, though a raiding party at my back was conspicuously absent. I got Skull down to half health, but after that my sword blows were damageless. After I died a couple of times, I tried some new strategies. One in particular, running behind the steaming machine and jumping, proved the right track. A tiny cut scene depicted me jumping on top of Skull's head; I looked like a was riding a mechanical bull. But when I started to mash some buttons in an ignorant attempt to spring an attack, I slid off harmlessly instead. I eventually got bored and quit.
The game shows promise though. I doubt it's anything I'll pick up. About the only Xbox game I'm thinking of purchasing outside of Rock Band 2 is The Force Unleashed. And even then I'm going to wait for some reviews first.
A Game of Thrones
After my brother finished Paolini's Eragon and Eldest, he was hungry for some more fantasy reading. He went to Barnes & Noble and asked an associate there if he recommended anything. The bookseller led him to George R.R. Martin's A Game of Thrones. I'm glad he did because my brother in turn led me to the series.
I had never heard of Martin or the Song of Ice and Fire series. My brother insisted they were good books and lent me two of them, though inconveniently not the first. I had to hit the streets and track down my own copy. Usually that's easy enough to do, especially with a book that came out more than a decade ago. But wouldn't you know, I couldn't find a copy to save my life. That was my first clue that perhaps I was about to read something great. I couldn't find the the book at Half Priced Books. My nearest Barnes & Noble only had the hardcover in stock. I finally found a paperback copy at a B&N some twenty miles away.
I finished AGoT this past weekend and am well into the sequel, A Clash of Kings. If you peruse some of the books' customer reviews at Amazon, you'll read some comparisons to Tolkien and the like. Ignore that. Martin's work bears little in common with Tolkien other than the characters share armaments and medieval technology. Other than that, the books are night and day to each other. I can best describe the series A Song of Ice and Fire as low fantasy with a historical fiction approach to plot, narrative, and character development. I've read little literary criticism of the series, but people have mentioned that the books political intrigue and warring houses is partly inspired from real history, specifically the War of the Roses and the Hundred Years' War.
Which is what makes the books so different from Tolkien and the hundreds of other fantasy settings inspired by him. True enough, Martin builds his own world. But the political in-fighting between the host of royal families fuels the narrative, not a single, epic quest. There's a hint of the fantastical. The book opens with a ranger party blundering into some viscous undead; the recon team fares badly in the encounter but I wouldn't exaclty say they "died." The book ends with a the rebirth of dragons, awe-inspiring creatures who used to support an entire ruling family but hadn't been seen for more than a hundred years.
But the fantasy element is the pinch of seasoning to the recipe that cooks up these books. The real driving force is strong character development. The individuals in the books have realistic motivations, most of them political. More importantly, they do the unexpected and they make mistakes. And they die. Martin painstakingly develops characters and then unceremoniously kills them off. It's shocking to be sure, but so rare these day in fantasy, it's the literary equivalent of traveling through a desert, throat wracked with thirst, and then stumbling upon an oasis. There's just something thrilling in the notion that any character may die at any time. Death is only a chapter away, even for a main character.
I don't know how Martin manages to weave so many character, plots, and subplots together in such a cohesive, entertaining way. But he does. As a result, he fashioned a page-turner. If you're a fan of fantasy, you've probably already read him. If you haven't, I highly recommend it. And if you're not a fantasy fan, this is probably the best vehicle for starting.
I'll end with a plea to Martin himself: please don't kill off Tyrion.
I had never heard of Martin or the Song of Ice and Fire series. My brother insisted they were good books and lent me two of them, though inconveniently not the first. I had to hit the streets and track down my own copy. Usually that's easy enough to do, especially with a book that came out more than a decade ago. But wouldn't you know, I couldn't find a copy to save my life. That was my first clue that perhaps I was about to read something great. I couldn't find the the book at Half Priced Books. My nearest Barnes & Noble only had the hardcover in stock. I finally found a paperback copy at a B&N some twenty miles away.
I finished AGoT this past weekend and am well into the sequel, A Clash of Kings. If you peruse some of the books' customer reviews at Amazon, you'll read some comparisons to Tolkien and the like. Ignore that. Martin's work bears little in common with Tolkien other than the characters share armaments and medieval technology. Other than that, the books are night and day to each other. I can best describe the series A Song of Ice and Fire as low fantasy with a historical fiction approach to plot, narrative, and character development. I've read little literary criticism of the series, but people have mentioned that the books political intrigue and warring houses is partly inspired from real history, specifically the War of the Roses and the Hundred Years' War.
Which is what makes the books so different from Tolkien and the hundreds of other fantasy settings inspired by him. True enough, Martin builds his own world. But the political in-fighting between the host of royal families fuels the narrative, not a single, epic quest. There's a hint of the fantastical. The book opens with a ranger party blundering into some viscous undead; the recon team fares badly in the encounter but I wouldn't exaclty say they "died." The book ends with a the rebirth of dragons, awe-inspiring creatures who used to support an entire ruling family but hadn't been seen for more than a hundred years.
But the fantasy element is the pinch of seasoning to the recipe that cooks up these books. The real driving force is strong character development. The individuals in the books have realistic motivations, most of them political. More importantly, they do the unexpected and they make mistakes. And they die. Martin painstakingly develops characters and then unceremoniously kills them off. It's shocking to be sure, but so rare these day in fantasy, it's the literary equivalent of traveling through a desert, throat wracked with thirst, and then stumbling upon an oasis. There's just something thrilling in the notion that any character may die at any time. Death is only a chapter away, even for a main character.
I don't know how Martin manages to weave so many character, plots, and subplots together in such a cohesive, entertaining way. But he does. As a result, he fashioned a page-turner. If you're a fan of fantasy, you've probably already read him. If you haven't, I highly recommend it. And if you're not a fantasy fan, this is probably the best vehicle for starting.
I'll end with a plea to Martin himself: please don't kill off Tyrion.
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Layla Kayleigh Has Fake Boobs!
I stole G4's own subject heading because there just isn't any other way to say it.
Oh Layla, say it isn't so!
Oh Layla, say it isn't so!
Saturday, August 2, 2008
New Content Available for PC Mass Effect
The update is called "Bring Down the Sky" and is free for registered owners of Mass Effect. Just head over here to snag some sweet content.
Hellgate: London Back from the Brink
1up reports that Hellgate: London may have been bought out by a Korean company, T3 Entertainment. 1up isn't basing this on an official announcement but instead infers it from recent job opening postings on Gamasutra.
I guess this is good news. What choice does the game have? It's either go belly up or get taken over by company best known for its dancing MMO. Dancing?
Oh sweet Jesus, this game is screwed.
I guess this is good news. What choice does the game have? It's either go belly up or get taken over by company best known for its dancing MMO. Dancing?
Oh sweet Jesus, this game is screwed.
The Joy of Home Ownership
We returned from San Antonio yesterday to a house atmospheric temperature of 95 degrees. The furnace fan was blowing, but only warm air flowed from the vents. I checked the condenser outside and it was turning but obviously not doing anything else of worth. Usually I can trip my breaker and reset everything, but repeated attempts were fruitless.
So I called some AC dudes. They came out, examined the condenser, and declared it DOA. Irreparable even. It had to be replaced.
Wifezilla and I have known for more than a year that we needed to replace not just the condenser, but the entire heating and cooling system. The furnace and blower are original to the house and our overall air flow is limp at best. The problem is that we've spent consecutive summers financing high-cost repairs to the house. Two years ago we replaced the roof and upstairs windows. Last summer we resided the house. Even though we knew the condenser was groaning ominous death-rattles, we had hoped it could hang on at least another year. But no.
So I had the AC dudes give us an estimate to replace the whole shebang. I've heard other estimates for this kind of work and though theirs was a bit higher, they offered a free year of financing and a life time warranty on both the furnace an the condenser. Best of all, they slapped the condenser in last evening so we could sleep under livable conditions. By five o'clock the house temperature had risen to 101 degrees. That's with all the windows open. It was actually cooler outside than inside our house. It took until midnight for the house to get back down under 80 degrees.
The crew returns this morning to replace the furnace, blower, and duct work. I guess the original furnace's installation was done half-ass, so they're going to fix that too and bring all the lines upstairs up to code.
Houston's forecast today? Sunny, with a high of 100 degrees.
So I called some AC dudes. They came out, examined the condenser, and declared it DOA. Irreparable even. It had to be replaced.
Wifezilla and I have known for more than a year that we needed to replace not just the condenser, but the entire heating and cooling system. The furnace and blower are original to the house and our overall air flow is limp at best. The problem is that we've spent consecutive summers financing high-cost repairs to the house. Two years ago we replaced the roof and upstairs windows. Last summer we resided the house. Even though we knew the condenser was groaning ominous death-rattles, we had hoped it could hang on at least another year. But no.
So I had the AC dudes give us an estimate to replace the whole shebang. I've heard other estimates for this kind of work and though theirs was a bit higher, they offered a free year of financing and a life time warranty on both the furnace an the condenser. Best of all, they slapped the condenser in last evening so we could sleep under livable conditions. By five o'clock the house temperature had risen to 101 degrees. That's with all the windows open. It was actually cooler outside than inside our house. It took until midnight for the house to get back down under 80 degrees.
The crew returns this morning to replace the furnace, blower, and duct work. I guess the original furnace's installation was done half-ass, so they're going to fix that too and bring all the lines upstairs up to code.
Houston's forecast today? Sunny, with a high of 100 degrees.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Mr. Pickles
A strategically placed Sanrio sucked us into its mercantile black hole yesterday. Hallie browsed stoically but I suspect she's getting too old for the store's wares. Claire, on the other hand, wasted little time returning with a handful of these, all differently flavored. At first I denied all requests; the girls have so much crap at home, Wifezilla literally has to fill garbage bags of toys and stuffed animals for donation. On a yearly basis. But for some reason, something about the frog made me chuckle, that permanently etched smile on its face perhaps. How very optimistic of it.
When we returned to the hotel with the bagged bundle of joy, Hallie examined him more closely, noting that he wore a name tag. "Hey, he's got a name! Mr. Pickles."
I instantly broke out laughing. Mr. Pickles has to either be the greatest stuffed animal name ever or the best cover name for a recidivist pedophile. I grabbed the frog to verify the tag myself. Hallie had read it wrong. It didn't say "Mr. Pickles," but "Pickles the Frog." A small error but a vast difference.
I note the correction to the entire room. Hallie and Claire both revert to the frog's intended name, but immediately I regret my interference. Mr. Pickles rolls off the tongue and turns an innocent frog into a rogue amphibian. I imagine the difference to be akin to that between Mr. Rogers and Chris Farley. I attempt to turn back time by constantly referring to him as Mr. Pickles. The girls resist, sometimes shouting Pickles the Frog back at me. Wifezilla rolls her eyes. But I press on, inserting Mr. Pickles into the conversation whenever the plush toy is mentioned.
Someone has to fight the good fight.
When we returned to the hotel with the bagged bundle of joy, Hallie examined him more closely, noting that he wore a name tag. "Hey, he's got a name! Mr. Pickles."
I instantly broke out laughing. Mr. Pickles has to either be the greatest stuffed animal name ever or the best cover name for a recidivist pedophile. I grabbed the frog to verify the tag myself. Hallie had read it wrong. It didn't say "Mr. Pickles," but "Pickles the Frog." A small error but a vast difference.
I note the correction to the entire room. Hallie and Claire both revert to the frog's intended name, but immediately I regret my interference. Mr. Pickles rolls off the tongue and turns an innocent frog into a rogue amphibian. I imagine the difference to be akin to that between Mr. Rogers and Chris Farley. I attempt to turn back time by constantly referring to him as Mr. Pickles. The girls resist, sometimes shouting Pickles the Frog back at me. Wifezilla rolls her eyes. But I press on, inserting Mr. Pickles into the conversation whenever the plush toy is mentioned.
Someone has to fight the good fight.
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