Mirtul 1, 1479
The captain I suspected lost in the nearby wood turned up in the town’s herbalist shop. Bewitched by a demoness posing as a farm girl! The succubus had her claws in the captain so deep, the poor man was sending his own troops—a man at a time—to a presumed death. We defeated the succubus and the demons that spawned to defend her. Unfortunately, the captain fought us defending his “queen.” Galindan slew him with a fireball.
Still at question: to what end did the succubus force the captain to bleed his garrison? It seems obvious to make the fort defenseless, but I hope to investigate more for a more definitive conclusion.
I need to get my hands on a Send scroll. I must update the Academy as to my progress.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Role-playing Log, Brom-lak Inksmear, May 2, 2009
Summary:
Very busy night for Str8 Rippin’ this past weekend. Dungeon Master pulled a rope-a-dope on me, hedging left, but swinging right. All signs pointed to trouble in the forest. Indeed, Fort Dolor’s captain had been sending this troops, one by one, to certain doom within the nearby woods. A bloodthirsty succubus, posing as a pretty farm damsel, charmed the poor soldier, beguiling him with enchanted love. As her enslaved minion, she had the captain order his men to the forest a few at a type. Why? That has yet to be seen, but all signs point towards a weakening of the town’s defenses.
Str8 Rippin’ handily revealed the farm damsel to be the wily demon for what she was. A network of caves lie in the back of the greenhouse, carved directly into a mountain wall.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
A good chunk of the evening was spent with a titanic fight against the succubus, the captain she enthralled, and her demon minions.
Role-playing Quality: Low
Brom had the chance to do a bit of interviewing, trying to quiz the townsfolk as to the source of the fort’s woes. He also did some mild interaction with his fellow adventurer, mostly low-grade role-playing. I’m trying to play out Brom as a detective of sorts, but haven’t had much traction as yet.
Very busy night for Str8 Rippin’ this past weekend. Dungeon Master pulled a rope-a-dope on me, hedging left, but swinging right. All signs pointed to trouble in the forest. Indeed, Fort Dolor’s captain had been sending this troops, one by one, to certain doom within the nearby woods. A bloodthirsty succubus, posing as a pretty farm damsel, charmed the poor soldier, beguiling him with enchanted love. As her enslaved minion, she had the captain order his men to the forest a few at a type. Why? That has yet to be seen, but all signs point towards a weakening of the town’s defenses.
Str8 Rippin’ handily revealed the farm damsel to be the wily demon for what she was. A network of caves lie in the back of the greenhouse, carved directly into a mountain wall.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
A good chunk of the evening was spent with a titanic fight against the succubus, the captain she enthralled, and her demon minions.
Role-playing Quality: Low
Brom had the chance to do a bit of interviewing, trying to quiz the townsfolk as to the source of the fort’s woes. He also did some mild interaction with his fellow adventurer, mostly low-grade role-playing. I’m trying to play out Brom as a detective of sorts, but haven’t had much traction as yet.
Monday, April 27, 2009
From the Journal of Brom-lak Inksmear
Tarsahk 30, 1479
We dispatched some minions of Gruumsh today and yesterday. Both bands descended on us in the dead of night like the cowards they are. The second ambush came as an act of revenge. Apparently, the ogre priest took umbrage at the slaying of his orc pets. Though it had nothing to do with my mission whatsoever, I took great satisfaction in the events of the last two days. Evil was delivered a blow this day.
Mirtul 1, 1479
On the outskirts of
Jirl Merris proved less friendly than her cousin in Bristol Watch. And even less open about Dolor’s troubles than the farmers beyond her gate. She came close to divulging details several times, but always stopped short with “. . . but no, I dare say no more.” She has the brusqueness of a busy tavern keeper, but like her fellows working the fields, I sense an underlying fear from her that conflicts her greatly.
She did reveal that
Whatever the source of the citizenry’s reluctance to inform and detail, it seems clear to me that a visit to the forest must happen. The earlier, the better. I’m traveling with a goodly band of adventurers and I’m betting they will agree to explore the nearby copse, if only for the chance at treasure and fame. I have no way to communicate with WLA, but I operate on the premise that I am charged with revealing, confronting, and defeating.
Of note, some members of my new adventuring friends took offense at some evidence I took from our first encounter with the orc Gruumans. The followers bear a curious sigil, unfamiliar to me so far. Curious, I lopped an arm off, just above the wrist, preserving the mark for others to hopefully identify. But when I pulled the arm out to show to Jirl Merris, some in my party balked! I must remember that not everyone handles such matters as clinically as I.
Role-playing Log, Brom-lak Inksmear, April 25, 2009
Summary:
Brom and Str8 Rippin' dispatched a band of orc and ogre Gruumsh followers on their way to Fort Dolor. Upon entering the town, the party began to piece together that people have been disappearing mysteriously and most everyone blames the nearby forest.
Role-playing Quantity: Medium
Real nice balance of role-playing and combat last session. Our DM called referred to our encounter with the Gruumsh followers as a "random, scripted encounter." His pack of "scripted" mobs killed a pack of gibberlings for us, to which I'm eternally grateful.
Role-playing Quality: Medium
I was able to work on Brom a bit last session. I'm playing him as helpful, even-tempered, reasonable. In other words, the exact opposite of Rend. Not quite as exciting, but it has the side-benefit of not pissing of the fellow players. I don't see Brom as a potential leader for the party, but I do see him as someone who will play a strong part in determining Str8 Rippin's mission base. I'm going to keep him fiercely loyal to the White Lotus Academy, so much so that he'll follow the Academy's orders and directions above those of the party's. That might prove some nice fertile ground to role-play in future sessions. Right now, Brom is firmly devoted to rooting out the danger that seems to grip Fort Dolor so firmly.
Brom and Str8 Rippin' dispatched a band of orc and ogre Gruumsh followers on their way to Fort Dolor. Upon entering the town, the party began to piece together that people have been disappearing mysteriously and most everyone blames the nearby forest.
Role-playing Quantity: Medium
Real nice balance of role-playing and combat last session. Our DM called referred to our encounter with the Gruumsh followers as a "random, scripted encounter." His pack of "scripted" mobs killed a pack of gibberlings for us, to which I'm eternally grateful.
Role-playing Quality: Medium
I was able to work on Brom a bit last session. I'm playing him as helpful, even-tempered, reasonable. In other words, the exact opposite of Rend. Not quite as exciting, but it has the side-benefit of not pissing of the fellow players. I don't see Brom as a potential leader for the party, but I do see him as someone who will play a strong part in determining Str8 Rippin's mission base. I'm going to keep him fiercely loyal to the White Lotus Academy, so much so that he'll follow the Academy's orders and directions above those of the party's. That might prove some nice fertile ground to role-play in future sessions. Right now, Brom is firmly devoted to rooting out the danger that seems to grip Fort Dolor so firmly.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
In Bruges
First off, "Bruges" is pronounced "brooge," as in it rhymes with "scrooge." You better drop the "es" or sound like a total idiot when you mention the movie's title. Not that I personally made that mistake. No way. Not a chance.
In Bruges is a great movie, by the way. "Don't hold it against me," is a common refrain that Americans in the movie say by way of admitting they're citizens of the United States (why do I now picture all Americans traveling abroad as constantly apologizing that they're American?).
But the movie could also say that about having Colin Farrell star in it: "Yes, Colin stars in me, but please! Don't hold that against me!" And you shouldn't because Farrell makes this movie. He's hilarious in it. He's got some of the movie's best lines and he delivers them like the half-drunken Irishman he probably is in real life, accompanied with some of the best facial acting I've seen in recent memory. If the sight of Farrell sickened you from the half dozen or so movies he's made this past decade, push that illness aside and give the man and his unibrow another chance. You won't be disappointed.
Even if Bruges is a shithole.
In Bruges is a great movie, by the way. "Don't hold it against me," is a common refrain that Americans in the movie say by way of admitting they're citizens of the United States (why do I now picture all Americans traveling abroad as constantly apologizing that they're American?).
But the movie could also say that about having Colin Farrell star in it: "Yes, Colin stars in me, but please! Don't hold that against me!" And you shouldn't because Farrell makes this movie. He's hilarious in it. He's got some of the movie's best lines and he delivers them like the half-drunken Irishman he probably is in real life, accompanied with some of the best facial acting I've seen in recent memory. If the sight of Farrell sickened you from the half dozen or so movies he's made this past decade, push that illness aside and give the man and his unibrow another chance. You won't be disappointed.
Even if Bruges is a shithole.
Role-playing Log, Brom-lak Inksmear, April 17, 2009
Summary:
Brom-lak Inksmear, genasi swordmage and premier student of the famed White Lotus Academy, is sent on a dangerous mission to investigate recent reports that some evil befalls a tiny village, one Bristol Watch, Vilhon Wilds. Brom travels to Bristol Watch with all due haste. Upon arriving, he finds the town completely devastated, but the threat neutralized. He soon meets the band of adventurers responsible for defeating the evil and gathers information from them, including the insect horde threat commanded by the nefarious Ne'ral.
Brom communicates back to the academy Elders (via Send ritual) all the intel he gathered. The Elders digest the information and respond in kind, ordering Brom to investigate a new threat, just two days west of Bristol Watch at the Fort Dolor. Str8 Rippin' agrees to accompany Brom to the fort as some in the party received their own information about rumblings west of Bristol Watch.
Role-playing Quantity: High
The entire night was nearly all role-playing. The only fight of the night barely qualified, a botched assassination attempt on Quinn.
Role-playing Quality: Medium
Brom is the new character I rolled to replace Rend. I'm essentially playing the same template, with the slight tweek that Brom is the Aegis of Shielding specc (a more defensive defender than the Assault version). I made Brom a student of the White Lotus Academy, a recent article published in the D&D Insider website. The DM placed the school north of Akanul, in Aglarond. My idea for Brom's journey to Bristol Watch and eventual integration with Str8 Rippin' was the investigation into the emergence of a ravenous insect horde in the Vilhon Wilds.
That proved a decent enough hook to get Brom with the rest of the players, but the role-playing aspect proved difficult. I really don't have a firm grasp on Brom's personality and motivations, beyond serving the academy as an investigator. As a result, I often felt at a lost on how to react to the other player characters. As a whole, my role-playing felt stilted and forced.
I think I'm going to have Brom play the part of a conscientious bureaucrat. He will take copious, detailed notes on behalf of the Academy's missions. I'm picturing a kind of Sherlock Holmes, branding a bastard sword rather than a pipe. That could prove fertile territory, though I bet it's going to be hard to play the role of detective with six other players.
Brom-lak Inksmear, genasi swordmage and premier student of the famed White Lotus Academy, is sent on a dangerous mission to investigate recent reports that some evil befalls a tiny village, one Bristol Watch, Vilhon Wilds. Brom travels to Bristol Watch with all due haste. Upon arriving, he finds the town completely devastated, but the threat neutralized. He soon meets the band of adventurers responsible for defeating the evil and gathers information from them, including the insect horde threat commanded by the nefarious Ne'ral.
Brom communicates back to the academy Elders (via Send ritual) all the intel he gathered. The Elders digest the information and respond in kind, ordering Brom to investigate a new threat, just two days west of Bristol Watch at the Fort Dolor. Str8 Rippin' agrees to accompany Brom to the fort as some in the party received their own information about rumblings west of Bristol Watch.
Role-playing Quantity: High
The entire night was nearly all role-playing. The only fight of the night barely qualified, a botched assassination attempt on Quinn.
Role-playing Quality: Medium
Brom is the new character I rolled to replace Rend. I'm essentially playing the same template, with the slight tweek that Brom is the Aegis of Shielding specc (a more defensive defender than the Assault version). I made Brom a student of the White Lotus Academy, a recent article published in the D&D Insider website. The DM placed the school north of Akanul, in Aglarond. My idea for Brom's journey to Bristol Watch and eventual integration with Str8 Rippin' was the investigation into the emergence of a ravenous insect horde in the Vilhon Wilds.
That proved a decent enough hook to get Brom with the rest of the players, but the role-playing aspect proved difficult. I really don't have a firm grasp on Brom's personality and motivations, beyond serving the academy as an investigator. As a result, I often felt at a lost on how to react to the other player characters. As a whole, my role-playing felt stilted and forced.
I think I'm going to have Brom play the part of a conscientious bureaucrat. He will take copious, detailed notes on behalf of the Academy's missions. I'm picturing a kind of Sherlock Holmes, branding a bastard sword rather than a pipe. That could prove fertile territory, though I bet it's going to be hard to play the role of detective with six other players.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Humble Grumble
My transfer to the district's newest middle school went through last week and I am neck-deep in work. I started working on the library's ODC (Opening Day Collection) last Thursday and only today am I beginning to grasp the enormity of my task. Over the past Easter holiday weekend, I averaged around six hours of work per day. And I put in about two to three hours each weekday evening too.
It sounds like I'm complaining, but I'm really not. It's an amazing opportunity to build a library from scratch. I know lots of librarians dying for the chance and most never will because it's a relatively rare endeavor. It's also a time-consuming process. I have starting lists as a reference point, but I still have to review each and every title on those lists, not to mention re-configuring bindings, quantities, and editions. It's an exercise in permutations, manipulating and controlling up to five options for some titles.
It doesn't help that I have a looming due date, too fast approaching. I have to have my final list order into the vendors by May 15th. In between now and that date, literally thousands of titles to sift through. I'm confident I'm going to hit the date on time, but it's going to take some concentrated effort on my part. My extra-curricular gaming has all but withered and died on the vine, except for my weekly D&D sessions. I don't see that changing much until June, at the earliest.
It sounds like I'm complaining, but I'm really not. It's an amazing opportunity to build a library from scratch. I know lots of librarians dying for the chance and most never will because it's a relatively rare endeavor. It's also a time-consuming process. I have starting lists as a reference point, but I still have to review each and every title on those lists, not to mention re-configuring bindings, quantities, and editions. It's an exercise in permutations, manipulating and controlling up to five options for some titles.
It doesn't help that I have a looming due date, too fast approaching. I have to have my final list order into the vendors by May 15th. In between now and that date, literally thousands of titles to sift through. I'm confident I'm going to hit the date on time, but it's going to take some concentrated effort on my part. My extra-curricular gaming has all but withered and died on the vine, except for my weekly D&D sessions. I don't see that changing much until June, at the earliest.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Role-playing Log, Rend-fol, April 9, 2009
Summary:
Rend and Str8 Rippin' face the final onslaught of insect invaders within a sandstone hive shaped like a chicken egg. The party prevails, but Rhogar the barbarian dies.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
Two consecutive large-scale fights consumed the entire evening of gaming.
Role-playing Quality: Low
See above.
Actually, I am most likely going to stop playing Rend and reroll. Playing a moderately evil character is a difficult thing to do within a cooperative game and Rend just isn't turning out like I hoped. I think playing an evil character can be done, it just will take more planning than what I did.
Though very lame, I want to continue playing a genasi swordmage, so I'll essentially continue playing the same statistics, just under a new name and background.
Rend and Str8 Rippin' face the final onslaught of insect invaders within a sandstone hive shaped like a chicken egg. The party prevails, but Rhogar the barbarian dies.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
Two consecutive large-scale fights consumed the entire evening of gaming.
Role-playing Quality: Low
See above.
Actually, I am most likely going to stop playing Rend and reroll. Playing a moderately evil character is a difficult thing to do within a cooperative game and Rend just isn't turning out like I hoped. I think playing an evil character can be done, it just will take more planning than what I did.
Though very lame, I want to continue playing a genasi swordmage, so I'll essentially continue playing the same statistics, just under a new name and background.
Krod Mandoon Series Premiere
I watched the Krod Mandoon the other night and laughed my ass off. It's a comedy show with a fantasy setting, a proprietary serialization along the lines of the movie, Meet the Spartans. In fact, Sean Maguire plays the lead, Kroddwick "Krod" Mandoon. I highly recommend the show.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Billy Bob Thornton: Cry Baby of the Month
What a tender, delicate man Billy Bob Thornton is. Such a precious, vulnerable artist. Not to mention tortured and suffering too.
Or it could be Billy Bob is just a complete, insufferable asshole. Watch this and decide for yourself.
Or it could be Billy Bob is just a complete, insufferable asshole. Watch this and decide for yourself.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Potato Day Rears Its Ugly Head
John Stewart wonders aloud if conservatives are confusing tyranny with losing.
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | M - Th 11p / 10c | |||
| Baracknophobia - Obey | ||||
| ||||
PETA
You may have thought that PETA stood for "People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals."
But you'd be wrong.
It really stands for this, as exemplified by the shirt of a fellow gym goer:
I now count myself a rigorous member of this fine organization.
But you'd be wrong.
It really stands for this, as exemplified by the shirt of a fellow gym goer:
I now count myself a rigorous member of this fine organization.
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Krod Mandoon
The show premieres on Comedy Central Thursday night and I've got it set to record because it looks funny as hell. Plus, I'm so close to abandoning Lost. I'm nearing the end of my capacity to watch that show anymore despite all the years invested.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Role-playing Log, Rend-fol, April 4, 2009
Summary:
Rend-fol and Str8 Rippin' plunged deeper into Ne'ral's nest. The party first battled an iron construct guarding bronze double doors. Floating orbs on either side of the room arced lightning across the expanse as the party struggled to fell the massive golem. Rend got hit by the room lightning twice, each bolt dealing no damage but rendering the victim "dazed." Normally, a toon can take three actions during their turn: a standard, a move, and minor. But when dazed, a toon can only take ONE of those actions. It can be any of the three, but only one. Spending the ENTIRE fight with only one action per turn rendered Rend the metaphorical equivalent of a hero in a wheel chair, veinly spinning his wheels and contributing as much effort to the fight as a bare-legged, black-socked senior citizen.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
Precious little opportunity to role-play. And Rend squandered the only real chance he had to reassert his true nature.
Role-playing Quality: Low
Rhogar, the party's resident dragonborn barbarian plunged himself down a 100 foot deep fang-shaped chasm. Rend pushed a pair of sandstone doors open and, without looking before he leaped, Rhogar rushed past him into a dark abyss. Rhogar didn't die from the fall (close though). And contrary to every fiber of his being, I had Rend leap over the bridge (that Rhogar did not narrowly miss) in a heroic gesture of sacrifice and rescue.
Wrong!
Rend should have pointed down the chasm and laughed. In hindsight, it turned out Rhogar didn't need anyone to help him. The dragonborn dispatched the minion insects that quickly surrounded him. Since the fall didn't kill him and the monsters waiting at the bottom didn't either, Rend could have had a memorable role-playing moment, worthy of his back story, character, and semi-evil intent. Instead, I panicked. I abandoned role-playing, meta-gamed, and calculated that Rhogar would likely die if too few of Str8 Rippin' came to his aid.
Lesson learned.
Rend-fol and Str8 Rippin' plunged deeper into Ne'ral's nest. The party first battled an iron construct guarding bronze double doors. Floating orbs on either side of the room arced lightning across the expanse as the party struggled to fell the massive golem. Rend got hit by the room lightning twice, each bolt dealing no damage but rendering the victim "dazed." Normally, a toon can take three actions during their turn: a standard, a move, and minor. But when dazed, a toon can only take ONE of those actions. It can be any of the three, but only one. Spending the ENTIRE fight with only one action per turn rendered Rend the metaphorical equivalent of a hero in a wheel chair, veinly spinning his wheels and contributing as much effort to the fight as a bare-legged, black-socked senior citizen.
Role-playing Quantity: Low
Precious little opportunity to role-play. And Rend squandered the only real chance he had to reassert his true nature.
Role-playing Quality: Low
Rhogar, the party's resident dragonborn barbarian plunged himself down a 100 foot deep fang-shaped chasm. Rend pushed a pair of sandstone doors open and, without looking before he leaped, Rhogar rushed past him into a dark abyss. Rhogar didn't die from the fall (close though). And contrary to every fiber of his being, I had Rend leap over the bridge (that Rhogar did not narrowly miss) in a heroic gesture of sacrifice and rescue.
Wrong!
Rend should have pointed down the chasm and laughed. In hindsight, it turned out Rhogar didn't need anyone to help him. The dragonborn dispatched the minion insects that quickly surrounded him. Since the fall didn't kill him and the monsters waiting at the bottom didn't either, Rend could have had a memorable role-playing moment, worthy of his back story, character, and semi-evil intent. Instead, I panicked. I abandoned role-playing, meta-gamed, and calculated that Rhogar would likely die if too few of Str8 Rippin' came to his aid.
Lesson learned.
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Slugging
This past week, I attended the Texas Library Association Convention, held here in Houston at the George R. Brown Convention Center. The Center resides downtown, just a block or two across from Minute Maid Park. I live in Houston's suburbs, so driving into downtown isn't an option I even entertain. Instead, I drive to the nearest Park and Barf, where I leave my truck and climb aboard one of those two car buses hooked together with that rubber accordion thingie.
It's a pleasant enough experience and a hell of lot faster and less stressful than trying to drive myself.
Waiting at the curb for my afternoon bus back home, I queued up in a line for the 214. I hadn't waited long before a white car pulled up to the curb and lowered its passenger window. The driver inside leaned over and yelled out, "217?" A man in the middle of the line next to me stepped out, strode deliberately up to the car, and climbed in. The car sped off. I shrugged my shoulders, completely mystified.
The next afternoon, I waited by the same curb, but earlier in the day so I alone formed the queue. I wasn't standing there even a minute before a white Lexus pulled up to the curb next to me, its passenger window lowering synchronously as the car came to an abrupt stop. Eerily similar to yesterday, the woman inside leaned over to get my attention and yelled, "214?"
I responded with a double-take. I thought, how the hell does she know what bus I need? And why does she care? I thought that, but I said, "Huh?" She repeated, "214? Hop in." I opened the door and slid in. She sped off when I closed the door and I stammered a question, something about does she often pick bus riders off the curb. She affirmed that she did, every morning and afternoon. I'm about to ask her the critical question of "why," when I see her steering her Lexus toward the HOV lane and then it suddenly dawned on me: she's picks up an extra passenger so she can legally use the city's High-occupancy Vehicle lane. I exhaled a mental breath of relief that I wasn't going to be driven to a slum and murdered in a desolate alleyway.
The kind driver (I don't think we ever exchanged names) indeed drove me to my Park and Barf, chit-chatting the entire time about her job (accounting) and about mine (teaching). The whole thing seemed surreal to me until she dropped me off at the station and I walked to my truck.
When I summarized the whole thing for Wifezilla, she cheerfully interrupted me with, "You were a slug!" Turns out drivers around the country jump at the chance to pick up hitchhikers; apparently, few of them have seen this movie lately. I have, and still stepped into the car of a complete stranger.
Turns out I was a slug and never knew it.
It's a pleasant enough experience and a hell of lot faster and less stressful than trying to drive myself.
Waiting at the curb for my afternoon bus back home, I queued up in a line for the 214. I hadn't waited long before a white car pulled up to the curb and lowered its passenger window. The driver inside leaned over and yelled out, "217?" A man in the middle of the line next to me stepped out, strode deliberately up to the car, and climbed in. The car sped off. I shrugged my shoulders, completely mystified.
The next afternoon, I waited by the same curb, but earlier in the day so I alone formed the queue. I wasn't standing there even a minute before a white Lexus pulled up to the curb next to me, its passenger window lowering synchronously as the car came to an abrupt stop. Eerily similar to yesterday, the woman inside leaned over to get my attention and yelled, "214?"
I responded with a double-take. I thought, how the hell does she know what bus I need? And why does she care? I thought that, but I said, "Huh?" She repeated, "214? Hop in." I opened the door and slid in. She sped off when I closed the door and I stammered a question, something about does she often pick bus riders off the curb. She affirmed that she did, every morning and afternoon. I'm about to ask her the critical question of "why," when I see her steering her Lexus toward the HOV lane and then it suddenly dawned on me: she's picks up an extra passenger so she can legally use the city's High-occupancy Vehicle lane. I exhaled a mental breath of relief that I wasn't going to be driven to a slum and murdered in a desolate alleyway.
The kind driver (I don't think we ever exchanged names) indeed drove me to my Park and Barf, chit-chatting the entire time about her job (accounting) and about mine (teaching). The whole thing seemed surreal to me until she dropped me off at the station and I walked to my truck.
When I summarized the whole thing for Wifezilla, she cheerfully interrupted me with, "You were a slug!" Turns out drivers around the country jump at the chance to pick up hitchhikers; apparently, few of them have seen this movie lately. I have, and still stepped into the car of a complete stranger.
Turns out I was a slug and never knew it.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Lolita
Snoozeweek has a weekly feature in its magazine that asks critically-acclaimed authors to list their most favorite literary titles. Time and time again, across a varied cross-section of famous writers, Vladmir Nabokov's Lolita makes the list. Considering the book is about a 40-something man seducing a twelve year old girl, I took the book as a pedophile voyeur's wet dream and never deigned to read it. But the literary value of this book must be immense to so effectively eclipse its chosen subject matter.
So I'm reading it right now. More to come when I finish.
So I'm reading it right now. More to come when I finish.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
The Pitt
I downloaded and played The Pitt this past weekend. In general, I enjoyed it. Even more than I did the first DLC for Fallout 3, Operation: Anchorage. But in both cases, I think the downloads are overpriced for the amount of content they provide. If a consumer buys both expansions for $20, that's roughly a third a cost of the original game but not even close to a third of the content. I think it took me longer to play through The Pitt, but it still went very fast. No more than four hours I guesstimate. That's a stark difference from the original's deep and substantial offering.
Yes, yes, $10 for four hours is a good value, you pay that much for a two hour movie, not including the popcorn and babysitter, blah, blah, blah. I just can't subscribe to that argument here, mostly because I'm not comparing the expansion to an evening at the movie theater, but to the game itself. And the bottom line is I kinda feel shortchanged by Bethesda at a $10 price point.
The next expansion promises to raise the level cap to 30, but despite the prospect of more leveling fun, I may not pick it up. At least not before first verifying it offers some weighty gameplay.
Yes, yes, $10 for four hours is a good value, you pay that much for a two hour movie, not including the popcorn and babysitter, blah, blah, blah. I just can't subscribe to that argument here, mostly because I'm not comparing the expansion to an evening at the movie theater, but to the game itself. And the bottom line is I kinda feel shortchanged by Bethesda at a $10 price point.
The next expansion promises to raise the level cap to 30, but despite the prospect of more leveling fun, I may not pick it up. At least not before first verifying it offers some weighty gameplay.
Firefox
I had to update iTunes the other day, a simple enough endeavor if not for the fact that Internet Explorer was rendered completely FUBAR'd after the patch. I have no idea what iTunes might have to do with IE, but I could not get Microsoft's browser to open links beyond a bookmarked site. Neither could I open the brower's preference link to further tinker. By way of Microsoft's surprisingly robust customer support knowledge base, I discovered a back door into IE's preference settings and the much needed factory reset that fixed my problem, but wiped out my cookies and bookmarks. It took me long enough to figure out the fix, I downloaded and tried out Firefox by way of retribution.
And now I'm almost exclusively using Mozilla's browser. I got some interface adjusting to do, but I already like some of the small things Firefox does differently, like password prompts and history bookmarks. Unless Firefox goes completely batshit on me, I'll likely make a new friend of it. I was almost livid with rage when IE busted on me (mixed with a generous helping of panic at being disconnected from the Internet), but perhaps it lead me to a better product.
And now I'm almost exclusively using Mozilla's browser. I got some interface adjusting to do, but I already like some of the small things Firefox does differently, like password prompts and history bookmarks. Unless Firefox goes completely batshit on me, I'll likely make a new friend of it. I was almost livid with rage when IE busted on me (mixed with a generous helping of panic at being disconnected from the Internet), but perhaps it lead me to a better product.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
W.
Wifezilla and I watched Oliver Stone's W. the other night and both of us liked it. If you're a fan of Bush, you probably won't be a fan of this movie, but that's only about 20% of people polled, so chances are W. will appeal to a broad audience.
Unlike other Stone movies, like JFK, W. does not reek of conspiracy and paranoia. I wouldn't say its historically accurate by any means, but the movie does seem to take a good stab at guessing what some of the behind-closed-doors meetings of Bush and his cabinet were like.
Josh Brolin was simply outstanding as George Bush. His performance reminds me of how well Joaquin Phoenix nailed Johnny Cash in Walk the Line. Scene after scene, I was amazed at how well Brolin captured Bush's mannerisms and cadence. Especially impressive is how he avoided a parody of the president; there's a clear distinction between Brolin's Bush and that of Will Farrell's.
Still, not all the performances were as good. Wifezilla didn't like Dreyfuss' Dick Cheney and we both hated Thandie Newton as Condaleezza Rice. I had no problem with Stone spinning Rice as Bush's toadying sycophant, but Newton spoke with a nasally, Urkel-esque voice that effectively destroyed entire scenes. I can't believe Stone let her play the character that way. If her character were in more of the movie, she may have single-handedly ruined it.
By the end of the movie, when Brolin's Bush struggles to answer a reporter's question as to what mistakes he has made during his presidency, I don't loath Bush anymore. I pity him. Stone obviously doesn't like Bush, and paints the man's presidency as a failure. Even so, Stone suspects that Bush realizes his cabinet conspired to lead him into a war he should have never started. I was painful to watch Bush grill Cheney and Rumsfield and Powell, almost berating them as to the location of the WMDs. Bush asks them the same question the rest of America asks later: how could CIA and NSA intel be so wrong?
Most likely because those agencies were telling the powers-that-be what they wanted to hear. For that, Bush deserves full blame for the Iraq war, despite any regrets he may have that he can't share publically. I blame him, but W. helps me understand how it all could have gone down and imagine a circumstance where Bush might not have ended up as one of the worst presidents the United States ever had.
Unlike other Stone movies, like JFK, W. does not reek of conspiracy and paranoia. I wouldn't say its historically accurate by any means, but the movie does seem to take a good stab at guessing what some of the behind-closed-doors meetings of Bush and his cabinet were like.
Josh Brolin was simply outstanding as George Bush. His performance reminds me of how well Joaquin Phoenix nailed Johnny Cash in Walk the Line. Scene after scene, I was amazed at how well Brolin captured Bush's mannerisms and cadence. Especially impressive is how he avoided a parody of the president; there's a clear distinction between Brolin's Bush and that of Will Farrell's.
Still, not all the performances were as good. Wifezilla didn't like Dreyfuss' Dick Cheney and we both hated Thandie Newton as Condaleezza Rice. I had no problem with Stone spinning Rice as Bush's toadying sycophant, but Newton spoke with a nasally, Urkel-esque voice that effectively destroyed entire scenes. I can't believe Stone let her play the character that way. If her character were in more of the movie, she may have single-handedly ruined it.
By the end of the movie, when Brolin's Bush struggles to answer a reporter's question as to what mistakes he has made during his presidency, I don't loath Bush anymore. I pity him. Stone obviously doesn't like Bush, and paints the man's presidency as a failure. Even so, Stone suspects that Bush realizes his cabinet conspired to lead him into a war he should have never started. I was painful to watch Bush grill Cheney and Rumsfield and Powell, almost berating them as to the location of the WMDs. Bush asks them the same question the rest of America asks later: how could CIA and NSA intel be so wrong?
Most likely because those agencies were telling the powers-that-be what they wanted to hear. For that, Bush deserves full blame for the Iraq war, despite any regrets he may have that he can't share publically. I blame him, but W. helps me understand how it all could have gone down and imagine a circumstance where Bush might not have ended up as one of the worst presidents the United States ever had.
Role-playing Log, Rend-Fol, March 29, 2009
Summary:
Coming off a titanic fight against a two-story tall monster bug, Rend-fol began the night's session watching other party members rush to aid the town's wounded and shore up damaged structures. He declined all requests to provide aid, including Quinn's attempts to drag the Behemoth bug into the town square for burning. After resting for the night, the party awakened the next morning and assembled, striking out for Na'ral's nest. Along the way, a horde of gibberlings attacked. The party dispatched the swarms, arriving at Na'ral's nest the following afternoon.
Role-playing Quantity: Medium
Numerous opportunities to role-play throughout the night's session, especially at the beginning and during the journey to Na'ral's nest.
Role-playing Quality: Low
But Rend didn't take good advantage of aforementioned opportunities. Playing an aloof dick makes for difficult role-playing because an aloof dick's default is to . . . do nothing! Which Rend did well throughout the night. True, it was consistent with his character to refuse to aid the wounded and dying, but I don't want his morality completely dictated by his inactions. His role-playing improved later in the session when he questioned a new addition to the party, Kane. But for the most part, I had Rend rely too much on the aloof, despondent archetype. Apathy leads to morose gameplay.
For the next session, I'm going to try and find a way to get Rend attached to his new party. Maybe from mutual respect, the idea that Rend has found adventures equal to him in skill and aptitude. He respects power and rarely confronts those that are his equal or better. If he's invested in the party (or a few member inside it), I can let his aloofness fade somewhat. He'll still be primarily motivated by coin or power, but I'll make him a bit more likely to do something the party asks him to do.
Coming off a titanic fight against a two-story tall monster bug, Rend-fol began the night's session watching other party members rush to aid the town's wounded and shore up damaged structures. He declined all requests to provide aid, including Quinn's attempts to drag the Behemoth bug into the town square for burning. After resting for the night, the party awakened the next morning and assembled, striking out for Na'ral's nest. Along the way, a horde of gibberlings attacked. The party dispatched the swarms, arriving at Na'ral's nest the following afternoon.
Role-playing Quantity: Medium
Numerous opportunities to role-play throughout the night's session, especially at the beginning and during the journey to Na'ral's nest.
Role-playing Quality: Low
But Rend didn't take good advantage of aforementioned opportunities. Playing an aloof dick makes for difficult role-playing because an aloof dick's default is to . . . do nothing! Which Rend did well throughout the night. True, it was consistent with his character to refuse to aid the wounded and dying, but I don't want his morality completely dictated by his inactions. His role-playing improved later in the session when he questioned a new addition to the party, Kane. But for the most part, I had Rend rely too much on the aloof, despondent archetype. Apathy leads to morose gameplay.
For the next session, I'm going to try and find a way to get Rend attached to his new party. Maybe from mutual respect, the idea that Rend has found adventures equal to him in skill and aptitude. He respects power and rarely confronts those that are his equal or better. If he's invested in the party (or a few member inside it), I can let his aloofness fade somewhat. He'll still be primarily motivated by coin or power, but I'll make him a bit more likely to do something the party asks him to do.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Modest Mouse
A friend turned me on to them and I'm glad he did. He lent me two of the band's albums, Good News for People Who Love Bad News and The Moon & Antarctica. Color me surprised when I recognized a track off Good News that I Rock Band drum to all the time, Float On.
I like the band so much, I recently picked up their latest album, We Were Dead Before the Ship Ever Sunk, a title I hope doesn't apply to the American citizenry and the current economic crisis.
I like the band so much, I recently picked up their latest album, We Were Dead Before the Ship Ever Sunk, a title I hope doesn't apply to the American citizenry and the current economic crisis.
Saved By the Hell
Last night, I dreamt I went out partying with the cast of Saved by the Bell. Well, not the entire cast, just the dudes: Zack, A.C., and Screech. At first I thought we were bar hopping, but we spent most of the dream in an arcade playing gun-toting video games. Towards the end of the dream, I glanced at my watch and realized I was late for Saturday night D&D. I told Zack I had to go (he drove), but somehow, somewhere, Zack got plastered and so I found myself stranded; I guess Zack had one Dr. Pepper too many.
Screech laughed and laughed at my predicament.
What I want to know is what in the hell is going on in my subconscious that I’m dreaming such things? When I told Wifezilla the dream this morning, she told me she was driving directly to the courthouse to file divorce papers.
Screech laughed and laughed at my predicament.
What I want to know is what in the hell is going on in my subconscious that I’m dreaming such things? When I told Wifezilla the dream this morning, she told me she was driving directly to the courthouse to file divorce papers.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Role-playing Workshop
I’ve been thinking about the approach I want to take with documenting the adventures of my D&D character, Rend-fol, and I’ve come up with an interesting tact. Each week, I’m going to summarize Rend’s most recent adventure. Nothing fancy, just a paragraph detailing what happened to Rend and his adventuring party, Str8 Rippin’.
Yes, the party’s name is Str8 Rippin’. Err, at least that’s my name for the party. If you asked anyone else in the group, you’d get a range of denials, everything from bemusement to contempt to weary resignation.
Anyway.
After I summarize Rend’s most recent exploits, I plan to break down Rend’s behavior that week. I envision it as a kind of role-playing synopsis, a method of tracking my character’s actions and attitudes and then comparing that to the background I wrote for Rend and the direction I want the character to go. Really, I see it as a kind of writer’s workshop, only focused on role-playing, a kind of critical analysis of how the session went in terms of Rend’s morality and decision making.
I’m really excited about this prospect because role-playing is a challenging endeavor. My hope is that if I am tracking and then analyzing Rend’s actions and attitudes, I can better track whether or not he’s in keeping with the idea I had for him in the first place.
Once the summary and the role-playing workshop are done, I’ll finish the week with any fan fiction I may have been inspired to write. I may or may not use session events as a basis for the fiction, but I definitely plan on changing names and classes of other players’ characters. I’ve even been toying with the idea of writing Rend’s prequel story, origin tales to fill out the barest of background frameworks I wrote for him.
This could be a bust because very often entire sessions are devoted to massive, hours long fights; there’s only so much role-playing anyone can do when a bullet has your head in its jaws, chewing enthusiastically. So I’m predicting that some weeks will be leaner than others.
Still, it’s worth a try
Yes, the party’s name is Str8 Rippin’. Err, at least that’s my name for the party. If you asked anyone else in the group, you’d get a range of denials, everything from bemusement to contempt to weary resignation.
Anyway.
After I summarize Rend’s most recent exploits, I plan to break down Rend’s behavior that week. I envision it as a kind of role-playing synopsis, a method of tracking my character’s actions and attitudes and then comparing that to the background I wrote for Rend and the direction I want the character to go. Really, I see it as a kind of writer’s workshop, only focused on role-playing, a kind of critical analysis of how the session went in terms of Rend’s morality and decision making.
I’m really excited about this prospect because role-playing is a challenging endeavor. My hope is that if I am tracking and then analyzing Rend’s actions and attitudes, I can better track whether or not he’s in keeping with the idea I had for him in the first place.
Once the summary and the role-playing workshop are done, I’ll finish the week with any fan fiction I may have been inspired to write. I may or may not use session events as a basis for the fiction, but I definitely plan on changing names and classes of other players’ characters. I’ve even been toying with the idea of writing Rend’s prequel story, origin tales to fill out the barest of background frameworks I wrote for him.
This could be a bust because very often entire sessions are devoted to massive, hours long fights; there’s only so much role-playing anyone can do when a bullet has your head in its jaws, chewing enthusiastically. So I’m predicting that some weeks will be leaner than others.
Still, it’s worth a try
Monday, March 23, 2009
Righting My Writing
As you've probably noticed, I've been writing noticeably less these past few months. A few key changes contribute to the tightening of my prose spigot. First and foremost, I had been doing a good chunk of the writing at work, mostly during lunch and whatnot, but sometimes not. Work has been kicking my ass as of late, and so the quantity diminished (I've opened myself up to a "quality" joke here, but I'll let you fill that in yourself). Within a week or so, I'm going to begin the first big steps of opening a brand new library, so discretionary time will not only disappear at work, but at home as well.
Another factor is that I had been writing my D&D group's weekly session summaries. Please, click the link and sally forth, especially if you enjoy inflicting bad fantasy writing on yourself. Based on a table-top role-playing game no less. I'll admit it, I had a lot of fun writing those summaries. It was fun distilling a night's worth of adventuring into seven or eight paragraphs. But over the long haul, it got tedious describing three hour long combat fights. Over time, you start to run out of ways to describe someone stabbing, decapitating, or eviscerating a fellow humanoid. And so towards the end, I shifted gears. I moved away from step-by-step accounting of how a fight went and moved more towards focusing on the story and filling in some gaps in-between.
I think that proved satisfying to me, but probably less so for my fellow players. Filling in blanks spots involved me taking artistic license with other people's characters and that leads to creativity and innovation, but also me just plain putting words and actions onto someone else's toon. Not so cool. Not so fair either.
For instance, Cedric the Wizard died the very last session we played with Craig as our Dungeon Master. Thinking about his death, I came up with an idea that I thought was hilarious: have the members grieve for Cedric ever so briefly and then proceed to discuss what a pain-in-the-ass it would be to try and get the poor slob back to town and resurrected. And then ultimately strip his body of loot and leave him lying in the middle of a dungeon floor. You can read the entire summary here, but what follows is the end:
Their foes dead, the party collapsed next to the still form of Cedric. Tears were shed. Sobs choked down. Finally, Gilic said, "Ack, he was good laddy. A wee bit chatty at times, but one of the good ones."
Gareth chuckled, "Yeah. Remember when he thought he could fly? He had to crawl across that blood chamber's ceiling like a hermit crab when it turned out he could only levitate."
The rest of the party laughed along with Gareth. A silence then came over them. Taegahn finally stood and said, "So, uh, what do we do with him now?"
When no one said anything, Shava responded, "We could take him back to Cormyr and perform a ritual to bring him back." Her idea seemed more a question then a statement.
The heroes glanced around at each other awkwardly. After a long time passed, Queequeg said, "I don't know, that seems like an awful lot of trouble. What with dragging the body back, storing the corpse, paying for the components. I heard the ritual only requires a thumb-sized piece of the person, but who wants that in their satchel for the next week?" The dragonborn's voice trailed off. No one said anything.
Gilic coughed uncomfortably. Orchid suddenly chimed in, "Say, didn't we meet a wizard in Seven-pillared Halls? That half-elf with the lazy eye and strange smell?"
Taegahn's face brightened. "Yeah, yeah. Babar, I think his name was. He asked if he could join up with us but we told him to piss off because, you know, we already had a wizard with a lazy eye and strange smell. Hey, do you think he's still there?"
Shava clapped her hands together happily and cheered, "Let's go see!" "To Seven Pillared Halls!" Gareth bellowed. Gilic grinned broadly, slapping the fighter on the back smartly.
And so, the Victors of Shadowfell Keep made ready to depart, but not before relieving Cedric of his notable gear and coinage. The heroes shuffled out of the chamber one at time, Queequeg the last. The dragonborn paused before exiting, turning back for a final look. Cedric, stripped down to his underwear, lay still and calm, seemingly sleeping but for the charred flesh and the blood trickling down from his nose and mouth.
"Uh, yeah," Queequeg intoned apologetically and then turned and left the labyrinth forever.
Ah, reading that again still cracks me up. But I did completely re-imagine the ending, which obviously didn't involve the party abandoning Credric's naked corpse in the middle of a dungeon. Which probably explains why Sean, the dude who played Cedric, was the only one that mentioned anything about the entry. I didn't summarize anything, just wrote an ending that cracked up one person: the author.
A few weeks earlier, I wrote an entirely invented scene inspired by the inane time-traveling nonsense going on in the current season of Lost. The whole thing was based on Craig, the Dungeon Master, momentarily forgetting that Uthlin never bought the crown the party had attained during their adventures. It was a good laugh at the session and it gave me the idea to write a summary where Uthlin hacks the party to death when they don't return the crown they "stole" from him. The summary is entitled "White Light," based on the space-time continuum returning to normal right before Uthlin is about to sink his axe into Cedric's head.
Ah, Lost, where would we be without your time-traveling hijinks. Watching good TV, that's where.
I mention both these entries because they highlight not just the transfer of my writing time and energy from this blog to the game's, but also the sheer joy I got from moving away from straight summaries and into retold tall tales. Which serves almost no utilitarian summary purpose and rivals the creative writing talent of a much sheltered junior high school student.
So I stopped writing those summaries too.
But I enjoy writing. And I enjoy twisting a base event into something I think is funny or ironic or tragic or a good, uneven mixture of all of those. So I think I'm going to shift my writing focus back to this blog. Not only that, I think I'm going to take the D&D toon I'm currently playing, Rend-fol, and write about him. I haven't quite figured out how I'm going to write about him. I'd like to chronicle his current adventures, but I want to shy away from characterizing other players' characters. My initial thought is to start with the adventures, make new names and classes for the other players, and then go from there. Maybe. I'm not sure yet.
Whatever approach I take, let me at least introduce Rend to you. "Bristol Watch Patrol" is the very last summary I wrote for the start of the new campaign we're currently playing. In it, I completely invented a confrontation between Rend and a fellow player's character, Rhogar. It won't take you long to conclude that Rend is a total asshat, which made writing the summary so fun and playing Rend so interesting. The summary is posted directly below this one. Enjoy.
Another factor is that I had been writing my D&D group's weekly session summaries. Please, click the link and sally forth, especially if you enjoy inflicting bad fantasy writing on yourself. Based on a table-top role-playing game no less. I'll admit it, I had a lot of fun writing those summaries. It was fun distilling a night's worth of adventuring into seven or eight paragraphs. But over the long haul, it got tedious describing three hour long combat fights. Over time, you start to run out of ways to describe someone stabbing, decapitating, or eviscerating a fellow humanoid. And so towards the end, I shifted gears. I moved away from step-by-step accounting of how a fight went and moved more towards focusing on the story and filling in some gaps in-between.
I think that proved satisfying to me, but probably less so for my fellow players. Filling in blanks spots involved me taking artistic license with other people's characters and that leads to creativity and innovation, but also me just plain putting words and actions onto someone else's toon. Not so cool. Not so fair either.
For instance, Cedric the Wizard died the very last session we played with Craig as our Dungeon Master. Thinking about his death, I came up with an idea that I thought was hilarious: have the members grieve for Cedric ever so briefly and then proceed to discuss what a pain-in-the-ass it would be to try and get the poor slob back to town and resurrected. And then ultimately strip his body of loot and leave him lying in the middle of a dungeon floor. You can read the entire summary here, but what follows is the end:
Their foes dead, the party collapsed next to the still form of Cedric. Tears were shed. Sobs choked down. Finally, Gilic said, "Ack, he was good laddy. A wee bit chatty at times, but one of the good ones."
Gareth chuckled, "Yeah. Remember when he thought he could fly? He had to crawl across that blood chamber's ceiling like a hermit crab when it turned out he could only levitate."
The rest of the party laughed along with Gareth. A silence then came over them. Taegahn finally stood and said, "So, uh, what do we do with him now?"
When no one said anything, Shava responded, "We could take him back to Cormyr and perform a ritual to bring him back." Her idea seemed more a question then a statement.
The heroes glanced around at each other awkwardly. After a long time passed, Queequeg said, "I don't know, that seems like an awful lot of trouble. What with dragging the body back, storing the corpse, paying for the components. I heard the ritual only requires a thumb-sized piece of the person, but who wants that in their satchel for the next week?" The dragonborn's voice trailed off. No one said anything.
Gilic coughed uncomfortably. Orchid suddenly chimed in, "Say, didn't we meet a wizard in Seven-pillared Halls? That half-elf with the lazy eye and strange smell?"
Taegahn's face brightened. "Yeah, yeah. Babar, I think his name was. He asked if he could join up with us but we told him to piss off because, you know, we already had a wizard with a lazy eye and strange smell. Hey, do you think he's still there?"
Shava clapped her hands together happily and cheered, "Let's go see!" "To Seven Pillared Halls!" Gareth bellowed. Gilic grinned broadly, slapping the fighter on the back smartly.
And so, the Victors of Shadowfell Keep made ready to depart, but not before relieving Cedric of his notable gear and coinage. The heroes shuffled out of the chamber one at time, Queequeg the last. The dragonborn paused before exiting, turning back for a final look. Cedric, stripped down to his underwear, lay still and calm, seemingly sleeping but for the charred flesh and the blood trickling down from his nose and mouth.
"Uh, yeah," Queequeg intoned apologetically and then turned and left the labyrinth forever.
Ah, reading that again still cracks me up. But I did completely re-imagine the ending, which obviously didn't involve the party abandoning Credric's naked corpse in the middle of a dungeon. Which probably explains why Sean, the dude who played Cedric, was the only one that mentioned anything about the entry. I didn't summarize anything, just wrote an ending that cracked up one person: the author.
A few weeks earlier, I wrote an entirely invented scene inspired by the inane time-traveling nonsense going on in the current season of Lost. The whole thing was based on Craig, the Dungeon Master, momentarily forgetting that Uthlin never bought the crown the party had attained during their adventures. It was a good laugh at the session and it gave me the idea to write a summary where Uthlin hacks the party to death when they don't return the crown they "stole" from him. The summary is entitled "White Light," based on the space-time continuum returning to normal right before Uthlin is about to sink his axe into Cedric's head.
Ah, Lost, where would we be without your time-traveling hijinks. Watching good TV, that's where.
I mention both these entries because they highlight not just the transfer of my writing time and energy from this blog to the game's, but also the sheer joy I got from moving away from straight summaries and into retold tall tales. Which serves almost no utilitarian summary purpose and rivals the creative writing talent of a much sheltered junior high school student.
So I stopped writing those summaries too.
But I enjoy writing. And I enjoy twisting a base event into something I think is funny or ironic or tragic or a good, uneven mixture of all of those. So I think I'm going to shift my writing focus back to this blog. Not only that, I think I'm going to take the D&D toon I'm currently playing, Rend-fol, and write about him. I haven't quite figured out how I'm going to write about him. I'd like to chronicle his current adventures, but I want to shy away from characterizing other players' characters. My initial thought is to start with the adventures, make new names and classes for the other players, and then go from there. Maybe. I'm not sure yet.
Whatever approach I take, let me at least introduce Rend to you. "Bristol Watch Patrol" is the very last summary I wrote for the start of the new campaign we're currently playing. In it, I completely invented a confrontation between Rend and a fellow player's character, Rhogar. It won't take you long to conclude that Rend is a total asshat, which made writing the summary so fun and playing Rend so interesting. The summary is posted directly below this one. Enjoy.
Bristol Watch Patrol
A bell tolled loudly through the bustling streets of Bristol Watch, an event more ominous than unusual. Inside the Bristol Watch Inn, Rend-fol heard the metallic chime and turned his head away from the bar to scan the crowd's reaction. Almost immediately, locals and new arrivals alike began murmuring as they put down drinks and forks and made for the door. Rend looked back at his new acquaintance, Rhogar, and asked, "A town summons? The people here don't seem surprised by the bell."
Rhogar took a long pull from his tankard, his scaled hide glistening in a rainbow of subdued hues. He paused for a moment, unleashed a terrific belch, and said, "No, they wouldn't be surprised. Hobgoblins frequently raid the surrounding farmlands. Cairth defends when he can, but we're talking large tracts of land here, none of it walled or fortified. Most likely, the bell rings to summon and organize the militia for patrols and defensive positions."
"Fight for this shit hole ? I'd advise pulling up stakes and following the shortest path to civilization," said Rend, smiling slightly.
"Stranger, that's the second time you've insulted my home. Do it again, and I'll test out how well my axe cuts through those wisps floating on the top of your noggin."
"I'm no lumberjack, but you look tall and thick. Maybe I should shout 'timber' so you don't fall and smother someone when I kill you."
The dragonborn set his tankard down on the bar and stood up, grasping the shaft of his great axe without even looking. Rhogar re-positioned it with both his massive paws, muscles flexing and rippling. He said nothing but took a combat stance, waiting. The bar was already clearing for the summons, but the crowd's pace quickened at the sight of the two armed men squaring off. From behind the bar, the inn keeper yelled, "Eh, Rhogar! You best be throwing this one back. I warn, you'll be payin' for the damages! Unlike last time!"
Rend's smile faded as he gazed darkly at Rhogar. His arms hung at his sides, his right fist alternately clenching and relaxing. The genasi took a quick glance around the now empty common room and then back at Rhogar. He seemed to be calculating something completely unrelated to the current confrontation. Finally, Rend turned his back to the dragonborn and strode out the bar in silence. Quinn nodded at the genasi as he walked out, but if Rend saw him, he gave no sign. Mikala leaned over to Quinn and remarked, "Nice social skills on that one." Quinn smiled and nodded, watching Rhogar lean his axe once more against the bar and grasp his tankard.
Outside, Rend saw what must have been the entire population of Bristol Watch converge at the Town Hall, a new building smelling of sap and pine. Mounted and waiting outside the doors of the Hall, Captain Cairth studied the flow of people with a tactical eye. Though most of the crowd were citizens of the small town, Rend noticed quite a few new arrivals, most of whom packed heavy weapons and armor with hardened countenances to boot. The genasi rearranged the sword strapped to his back and then walked confidently into the milling crowd until he was directly in front of the Captain.
"Captain," Rend called out, attempting to attract Cairth's attention. Cairth pretended to not hear, turning his head away and scanning the other side of the growing crowd. Irritated, Rend called out again, though this time more loudly. Cairth slowly turned his head back to Rend, his eyes narrowing.
"What." It was a statement, not a question.
"So what's going on?" Rend inquired.
Cairth eyed Rend for a moment, a flicker of recognition registering on his face. "You're that genasi that claimed Dirg Stiggler was most righteous in his beating of that farm boy. Said the hin had been cheated."
"Yeah, that's right." Rend crossed his arms over his chest and waited impertinently.
"Well son, I don't know how that kind of thing goes down where you're from, but around here, we don't take a pound a flesh for the smallest slights. You best keep that in mind for future encounters with my citizenry."
Before Rend could respond, the Captain clucked his tongue, lurching his horse forward into the crowd. When he got to the middle, he brought the horse to a halt and addressed the crowd in a commanding voice. "We've got hobgoblin raids up and down our farmlands. Looting, pillaging, even few reports of deaths. Sloan here brought the bodies of the Haskins family this past hour. I hope those to be the only casualties, but my gut tells me there'll be more. We'll be forming up militia patrols throughout the rest of the day and tonight. Lighter forces will walk the first part, and we'll save our strongest forces for the night, when the hobs are more active. I'll be expectin' every able bodied citizen to do his part. Bring what weapons you have, mounts too if you got them. New visitors to Bristol Watch, you aren't obligated to fight, but we'll pay you if you do. Rhogar! Galinndan!"
The Captain scanned the crowd until he spotted the dragonborn's head towering well over everyone else. "Ah, Rhogar, you're a difficult man to spot, what with that delicate profile you cut." The crowd laughed and Cairth continued. "Rhogar, I want you and Galinndan to manage visitor recruitment."
Rhogar nodded, effortlessly heaving his axe on his shoulder. Another man appeared next to him, a blacksmith by attire, and said, "It will be done."
Cairth nodded in approval and said, "For the rest that aren't fighting or patrolling, I'm declaring martial law. I want the inn and businesses closed and the citizenry to stay in their homes. The Town Hall is reserved for the refugees of the surrounding farmlands. That is all."
Cairth reared his horse back and cantered back to the Town Hall. He dismounted and immediately began issuing orders. The crowd immediately dispersed, some heading home to cower fearfully in their homes, others grimly checking equipment and swinging weapons.
Rhogar took a long pull from his tankard, his scaled hide glistening in a rainbow of subdued hues. He paused for a moment, unleashed a terrific belch, and said, "No, they wouldn't be surprised. Hobgoblins frequently raid the surrounding farmlands. Cairth defends when he can, but we're talking large tracts of land here, none of it walled or fortified. Most likely, the bell rings to summon and organize the militia for patrols and defensive positions."
"Fight for this shit hole ? I'd advise pulling up stakes and following the shortest path to civilization," said Rend, smiling slightly.
"Stranger, that's the second time you've insulted my home. Do it again, and I'll test out how well my axe cuts through those wisps floating on the top of your noggin."
"I'm no lumberjack, but you look tall and thick. Maybe I should shout 'timber' so you don't fall and smother someone when I kill you."
The dragonborn set his tankard down on the bar and stood up, grasping the shaft of his great axe without even looking. Rhogar re-positioned it with both his massive paws, muscles flexing and rippling. He said nothing but took a combat stance, waiting. The bar was already clearing for the summons, but the crowd's pace quickened at the sight of the two armed men squaring off. From behind the bar, the inn keeper yelled, "Eh, Rhogar! You best be throwing this one back. I warn, you'll be payin' for the damages! Unlike last time!"
Rend's smile faded as he gazed darkly at Rhogar. His arms hung at his sides, his right fist alternately clenching and relaxing. The genasi took a quick glance around the now empty common room and then back at Rhogar. He seemed to be calculating something completely unrelated to the current confrontation. Finally, Rend turned his back to the dragonborn and strode out the bar in silence. Quinn nodded at the genasi as he walked out, but if Rend saw him, he gave no sign. Mikala leaned over to Quinn and remarked, "Nice social skills on that one." Quinn smiled and nodded, watching Rhogar lean his axe once more against the bar and grasp his tankard.
Outside, Rend saw what must have been the entire population of Bristol Watch converge at the Town Hall, a new building smelling of sap and pine. Mounted and waiting outside the doors of the Hall, Captain Cairth studied the flow of people with a tactical eye. Though most of the crowd were citizens of the small town, Rend noticed quite a few new arrivals, most of whom packed heavy weapons and armor with hardened countenances to boot. The genasi rearranged the sword strapped to his back and then walked confidently into the milling crowd until he was directly in front of the Captain.
"Captain," Rend called out, attempting to attract Cairth's attention. Cairth pretended to not hear, turning his head away and scanning the other side of the growing crowd. Irritated, Rend called out again, though this time more loudly. Cairth slowly turned his head back to Rend, his eyes narrowing.
"What." It was a statement, not a question.
"So what's going on?" Rend inquired.
Cairth eyed Rend for a moment, a flicker of recognition registering on his face. "You're that genasi that claimed Dirg Stiggler was most righteous in his beating of that farm boy. Said the hin had been cheated."
"Yeah, that's right." Rend crossed his arms over his chest and waited impertinently.
"Well son, I don't know how that kind of thing goes down where you're from, but around here, we don't take a pound a flesh for the smallest slights. You best keep that in mind for future encounters with my citizenry."
Before Rend could respond, the Captain clucked his tongue, lurching his horse forward into the crowd. When he got to the middle, he brought the horse to a halt and addressed the crowd in a commanding voice. "We've got hobgoblin raids up and down our farmlands. Looting, pillaging, even few reports of deaths. Sloan here brought the bodies of the Haskins family this past hour. I hope those to be the only casualties, but my gut tells me there'll be more. We'll be forming up militia patrols throughout the rest of the day and tonight. Lighter forces will walk the first part, and we'll save our strongest forces for the night, when the hobs are more active. I'll be expectin' every able bodied citizen to do his part. Bring what weapons you have, mounts too if you got them. New visitors to Bristol Watch, you aren't obligated to fight, but we'll pay you if you do. Rhogar! Galinndan!"
The Captain scanned the crowd until he spotted the dragonborn's head towering well over everyone else. "Ah, Rhogar, you're a difficult man to spot, what with that delicate profile you cut." The crowd laughed and Cairth continued. "Rhogar, I want you and Galinndan to manage visitor recruitment."
Rhogar nodded, effortlessly heaving his axe on his shoulder. Another man appeared next to him, a blacksmith by attire, and said, "It will be done."
Cairth nodded in approval and said, "For the rest that aren't fighting or patrolling, I'm declaring martial law. I want the inn and businesses closed and the citizenry to stay in their homes. The Town Hall is reserved for the refugees of the surrounding farmlands. That is all."
Cairth reared his horse back and cantered back to the Town Hall. He dismounted and immediately began issuing orders. The crowd immediately dispersed, some heading home to cower fearfully in their homes, others grimly checking equipment and swinging weapons.
Have Mountain Goat, Will Travel
Lukenbach made great strides this past weekend. My dwarf minstrel not only blew past level 58, well on his way to 59, he also accrued enough miner reputation to get the entry level Moria mount, the Red-horned mountain goat. It's slower than U.S. economic recovery, but still faster than walking. The next goat travels as fast as a normal horse, but takes the top miner reputation, kindred, so I won't see that goodly beast for a long time.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Lukenbach, Post Book 7
I took my minstrel, Lukenbach, for a spin this morning and indeed he benefits greatly from LotRO's most recent patch. I was most pleased to find that Turbine switched Call of Fate from a level 60 skill to 56, making Lukenbach an instant qualifier. Call of Fate is a more robust version of Piercing cry, with high crit potential and the highest raw damage in a minstrel's arsenal.
So after training the Call of Fate, I took Lukenbach down to Gazatu-ru, the scene of much fleeing and death before Book 7. Deep in the central halls of Moria, Gazatu-ru crams mobs within feet of each other. Smart pulls are a must, without which soloing is impossible. Lukenbach needed to kill eighteen orcs in Gazatu-ru and before Book 7, he couldn't do it. Most pulls involve two mobs and frequently incur a third patroller. And as tight as space is in Moria, fleeing almost never succeeded.
This time around, however, Lukenbach easily dispatched two mobs at time. He even fended off ganks of a third mob, though often just barely. This patch bodes well, I think, for my bard. Couple that with the easement of xp restrictions and I'm getting even more inspired to level up Kammris and then work on my hobbit warden, Smaur.
So after training the Call of Fate, I took Lukenbach down to Gazatu-ru, the scene of much fleeing and death before Book 7. Deep in the central halls of Moria, Gazatu-ru crams mobs within feet of each other. Smart pulls are a must, without which soloing is impossible. Lukenbach needed to kill eighteen orcs in Gazatu-ru and before Book 7, he couldn't do it. Most pulls involve two mobs and frequently incur a third patroller. And as tight as space is in Moria, fleeing almost never succeeded.
This time around, however, Lukenbach easily dispatched two mobs at time. He even fended off ganks of a third mob, though often just barely. This patch bodes well, I think, for my bard. Couple that with the easement of xp restrictions and I'm getting even more inspired to level up Kammris and then work on my hobbit warden, Smaur.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Dawn of War: Gold Edition
I've been having so much fun with Dawn of War II, I fired up Steam and tried out the demos to the original, Dawn of War. They turned out to be even more fun, so much so I bought the gold edition. I've never made a Steam purchase before, but the experience was a good one. What I like most about the service is that once you purchase the game, its key is permanently linked to your Steam account. If you uninstall the game, you want always download and install it again later. It also means you can download and play the game on another computer.
I always think of myself as the type of person that needs that physical copy in my grubby little hands. But as less and less shelf space is devoted to PC gaming, it could be that digital purchasing may turn into the only viable method for distributing PC games. At first glance, that seems a shame. But with a service as good and dependable as Steam, perhaps it's not.
I always think of myself as the type of person that needs that physical copy in my grubby little hands. But as less and less shelf space is devoted to PC gaming, it could be that digital purchasing may turn into the only viable method for distributing PC games. At first glance, that seems a shame. But with a service as good and dependable as Steam, perhaps it's not.
Level Up!
Turbine released Book 7 for Lord of the Rings Online this past Tuesday. Following Blizzard's lead in WoW, Turbine changed the experience requirements for leveling in this latest patch. As a result, my lower level toons saw a 2-3 level increase when I logged in. Kammris and Lukenbach both earned only 1 level, but both are more of the way towards the next.
A brief scan of the boards tells me that hunters got nerfed. The fix is receiving mixed reviews, with a surprising number of hunter players applauding the change, flat-out admitting their toons were over-powered.
It will be interesting to see how Lukenbach, my minstrel plays after the patch. To be perfectly honest, I stopped playing him for a time because the Mines are freaking brutal. It's really tough to soloing stuff, even more so as a minstrel. And forget about trying to take on more than one mob at a time; space is so tight in the Mines, one almost invariably draws unwanted mobs, leading to frequent fleeing or death.
A brief scan of the boards tells me that hunters got nerfed. The fix is receiving mixed reviews, with a surprising number of hunter players applauding the change, flat-out admitting their toons were over-powered.
It will be interesting to see how Lukenbach, my minstrel plays after the patch. To be perfectly honest, I stopped playing him for a time because the Mines are freaking brutal. It's really tough to soloing stuff, even more so as a minstrel. And forget about trying to take on more than one mob at a time; space is so tight in the Mines, one almost invariably draws unwanted mobs, leading to frequent fleeing or death.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Interpol Working on 4th Album
As per their very own site, Interpol has reassembled and in their own words, "rehearsing new songs."
Thanks to Rock Band, I thoroughly discovered Interpol and wait with giddy anticipation for their next album.
Thanks to Rock Band, I thoroughly discovered Interpol and wait with giddy anticipation for their next album.
Trip the Light Fantastic
So we changed up Dungeon Masters a couple of weeks ago. Two players competed violently for the right to manage the game's dungeons and dragons. Round one involved arm wrestling, but the two pasty contestants' muscles proved too atrophied to produce a winner. Round two moved on to naked pudding wrestling, chocolate and vanilla swirl. The match had no more begun than the spectators began retching uncontrollably. As a result, a tie was called and both declared Dungeon Master.
Blake, the first of the two to take the reins, runs a business selling . . . crap on Ebay. Yes, much like that chick on The 40 Year Old Virgin. I remind him of this often. Surprisingly, he fails to see the humor in it. At any rate, via the business he runs, Blake bought an entire palette of ancient LCD projectors for $5. Each one must weigh at least 500 pounds and comes with feature (instead of features). Last session, Blake mounted it on the ceiling of the room we game and then proceeded to project some sweet-ass game maps for us run around and kill shit. Beats the hell out of ten-minute Sharpie scrawling. Err, except, the projector dates back to the 20th century and thus retains the lumen power of my desk lamp. Forcing us to turn out all the lights.
I think I may have been sexually assaulted at that last session, but wouldn't be able to identify my attacker if my life depended on it.
Blake, the first of the two to take the reins, runs a business selling . . . crap on Ebay. Yes, much like that chick on The 40 Year Old Virgin. I remind him of this often. Surprisingly, he fails to see the humor in it. At any rate, via the business he runs, Blake bought an entire palette of ancient LCD projectors for $5. Each one must weigh at least 500 pounds and comes with feature (instead of features). Last session, Blake mounted it on the ceiling of the room we game and then proceeded to project some sweet-ass game maps for us run around and kill shit. Beats the hell out of ten-minute Sharpie scrawling. Err, except, the projector dates back to the 20th century and thus retains the lumen power of my desk lamp. Forcing us to turn out all the lights.
I think I may have been sexually assaulted at that last session, but wouldn't be able to identify my attacker if my life depended on it.
Dawn of War II
I picked up the latest Warhammer RTS because I'm a glutton for punishment. It's a well-documented character flaw that I like playing real-time strategy games, they just don't like me playing them.
A slew of critical reviews perked my interest in this latest installment. Gamespot in particular mentions numerous times that the game's single player campaign plays more like an action RPG than a RTS, right down to looting gear off conquered mobs. I know GS meant that as a criticism, but I took it as a selling point. As much as I enjoy building a base, upgrading units, and then churning them out like gummy bears in a candy factoring, I never strike a good balance between the building aspect of the game and the part where you steer your army towards an opponent and kick some ass. I always mobilize too soon or too late, mostly erring towards the latter. I think it's a patience thing. I have enough to painstakingly build a base, but not enough to coordinate that with strategic and tactical real-time combat.
But DoW II seemed a departure. There's no base building in the campaign, only squads and a main hero unit. And Gamespot is right, the single player aspect plays almost like Diablo, except a bit more tactical. Launching all your squads headlong into battle sometimes (but not always) leads to swift slaughter. So I'm enjoying the game so far and getting my RTS fix to boot. I guess this means I might thing about picking up Starcraft II, rumored to be coming out sometime in June.
A slew of critical reviews perked my interest in this latest installment. Gamespot in particular mentions numerous times that the game's single player campaign plays more like an action RPG than a RTS, right down to looting gear off conquered mobs. I know GS meant that as a criticism, but I took it as a selling point. As much as I enjoy building a base, upgrading units, and then churning them out like gummy bears in a candy factoring, I never strike a good balance between the building aspect of the game and the part where you steer your army towards an opponent and kick some ass. I always mobilize too soon or too late, mostly erring towards the latter. I think it's a patience thing. I have enough to painstakingly build a base, but not enough to coordinate that with strategic and tactical real-time combat.
But DoW II seemed a departure. There's no base building in the campaign, only squads and a main hero unit. And Gamespot is right, the single player aspect plays almost like Diablo, except a bit more tactical. Launching all your squads headlong into battle sometimes (but not always) leads to swift slaughter. So I'm enjoying the game so far and getting my RTS fix to boot. I guess this means I might thing about picking up Starcraft II, rumored to be coming out sometime in June.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
Watchmen
There's lots of reviews floating around out there on the Watchman movie, most of them flogging the movie for poorly adapting its source material. Here's the review from CNN.
I don't agree with this guy, but at least he read the book, which likely isn't the case with some of the written opinions of the Watchmen. The controversy swirling around this movie has always been how anyone would film the "unfilmable" movie. So it strikes me as a bit lazy and tired to read reviews bitching about how Snyder stuck too closely to the graphic novel:
"Snyder slavishly transcribes what's set down 5 inches in front of his face."
but somehow also adapted the movie enough to also invite this criticism:
"On the few occasions where the filmmakers do exercise their imaginations -- in a credit montage relating the glory days of the crimefighters Weegee-style, and in a neat improvement on Moore's climax -- the results are actually ingenious and sharp."
From the git-go, Snyder and the team that worked on this film were damned if they do, equally damned if they don't. I think the film did a great job of capturing the angst of washed up superheroes, the vigilantism and detective work of Rorschach, and the fear of an over dramatized Cold War conflict. Few book to movie translation ever go well because opinions vary widely on the inevitable editing and contracting that must be done when the source material is squeezed on to the big screen.
Snyder did about as good a job as anyone could have.
I don't agree with this guy, but at least he read the book, which likely isn't the case with some of the written opinions of the Watchmen. The controversy swirling around this movie has always been how anyone would film the "unfilmable" movie. So it strikes me as a bit lazy and tired to read reviews bitching about how Snyder stuck too closely to the graphic novel:
"Snyder slavishly transcribes what's set down 5 inches in front of his face."
but somehow also adapted the movie enough to also invite this criticism:
"On the few occasions where the filmmakers do exercise their imaginations -- in a credit montage relating the glory days of the crimefighters Weegee-style, and in a neat improvement on Moore's climax -- the results are actually ingenious and sharp."
From the git-go, Snyder and the team that worked on this film were damned if they do, equally damned if they don't. I think the film did a great job of capturing the angst of washed up superheroes, the vigilantism and detective work of Rorschach, and the fear of an over dramatized Cold War conflict. Few book to movie translation ever go well because opinions vary widely on the inevitable editing and contracting that must be done when the source material is squeezed on to the big screen.
Snyder did about as good a job as anyone could have.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
I AM Conan the Librarian
Ok, so you have good reason to doubt. After all, I proclaimed the exact same thing last year, but ended up crashing and burning.
I assure you, gentle reader, this time I really AM Conan the Librarian. Last week, I interviewed for the library position of the new middle school opening this fall. I made the initial cut and was invited back for a second interview yesterday. Of the two, my second interview went best. I was mostly coherent and knowledge for both, but I really nailed my second.
And so this afternoon, I got the official call from the principal. WOOT!
I'm especially stoked about this because I taught middle school kids for nine years before becoming a librarian. I know them well and have a unique appreciation of their quirkiness. I think I like middle school kids because there's a part of me that's just as immature as they are. I've been at an elementary school for the past three years, and though I've learned a lot, I know I can't make a career out of managing a primary-geared library.
But James? Cannot lightning strike twice? Might your new position be cut from underneath you, just like last year?
In a word, no. My new principal held off hiring for nearly two weeks waiting for the Human Resource department to approve her open positions. They won't cut the position because they just got done approving it a few short weeks ago. It should all be official by the middle of the month.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to drive the illiterate before me. Cue the brass and war drums.
I assure you, gentle reader, this time I really AM Conan the Librarian. Last week, I interviewed for the library position of the new middle school opening this fall. I made the initial cut and was invited back for a second interview yesterday. Of the two, my second interview went best. I was mostly coherent and knowledge for both, but I really nailed my second.
And so this afternoon, I got the official call from the principal. WOOT!
I'm especially stoked about this because I taught middle school kids for nine years before becoming a librarian. I know them well and have a unique appreciation of their quirkiness. I think I like middle school kids because there's a part of me that's just as immature as they are. I've been at an elementary school for the past three years, and though I've learned a lot, I know I can't make a career out of managing a primary-geared library.
But James? Cannot lightning strike twice? Might your new position be cut from underneath you, just like last year?
In a word, no. My new principal held off hiring for nearly two weeks waiting for the Human Resource department to approve her open positions. They won't cut the position because they just got done approving it a few short weeks ago. It should all be official by the middle of the month.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to drive the illiterate before me. Cue the brass and war drums.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Conan the Librarian
Once again, my sensei asks me, "James, what is best in life."
I dare not flinch when I respond in a rote voice, "To fine your patrons, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the illiterate."
Cue the war drums. I'm mounting up. I'm fining and driving my library patrons before me. I may soon hear the lamentation of the illiterate.
Soon, but not yet. More to follow, possibly.
I dare not flinch when I respond in a rote voice, "To fine your patrons, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the illiterate."
Cue the war drums. I'm mounting up. I'm fining and driving my library patrons before me. I may soon hear the lamentation of the illiterate.
Soon, but not yet. More to follow, possibly.
Why Does It Grow So Well There?
I turned 39 last week. It’ll be the big four zero next year, so I’m savoring my last milestone in the thirties.
For those of you who are curious as to what 39 is like, all I can say is it’s very similar to 29 except my nose hair grows faster than the hair on top of my head. Also, if I eat anything an hour or two before bedtime, my stomach rumbles and lurches with plumes of volcanic acid action. Mind you, this doesn’t stop me from eating before sleeping. At least not yet. I gamble that digestion issues will steadily worsen as I get older.
I got some great birthday gifts this year, including some sweet, lovable cards from my girls. My Ma made me a Star Wars fleece blanket, complete with Darth Vader heads plastered all over both sides in a black and orange color scheme. I love that blanket, more so because it’s got maternal love sewn right into it. If I get a chance, I’ll post a picture of it this week.
Wifezilla scored me a pair of nice hiking boots in anticipation of our Colorado trip this summer. She got a new pair herself eight years ago, right before Hallie was born. Of course, she hasn’t worn them once since so she’s just as excited to slap her boots on and do some serious hiking.
For those of you who are curious as to what 39 is like, all I can say is it’s very similar to 29 except my nose hair grows faster than the hair on top of my head. Also, if I eat anything an hour or two before bedtime, my stomach rumbles and lurches with plumes of volcanic acid action. Mind you, this doesn’t stop me from eating before sleeping. At least not yet. I gamble that digestion issues will steadily worsen as I get older.
I got some great birthday gifts this year, including some sweet, lovable cards from my girls. My Ma made me a Star Wars fleece blanket, complete with Darth Vader heads plastered all over both sides in a black and orange color scheme. I love that blanket, more so because it’s got maternal love sewn right into it. If I get a chance, I’ll post a picture of it this week.
Wifezilla scored me a pair of nice hiking boots in anticipation of our Colorado trip this summer. She got a new pair herself eight years ago, right before Hallie was born. Of course, she hasn’t worn them once since so she’s just as excited to slap her boots on and do some serious hiking.
Friday, February 20, 2009
Arrrggghhh Virtues!
I did a bit of research on Champions and it turns out I’ve assigned Kammris all the wrong virtues. Well, not all. I’ve got him slotted with Justice and Valour, but all classes seem to take those two. But the other three were totally wrong and too my complete dismay, the other three traits he needs are all bottomed out at one. That’s right, Kammris did not follow Lukenbach’s policy of clean up a zone’s deeds. As a result, I have my level 47 toon running around lowbie areas beating the hell out of level five mobs.
/sigh
The good news is that the earliest deed requirements start with 30 mobs for the title, 60 for the virtue. Those requirements tend to double as you venture farther out into higher level zones. The highest I’ve seen so far is Angmar, 150 for the title, 300 for the virtue.
Luckily, Kammris is a champion and he chews through stuff pretty quickly. The biggest barrier is finding an area with a high concentration of the needed mobs. The higher the density, the faster the grinding goes as you don’t waste as much time waiting for respawns. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an onerous process. It’s fine when you grind these things as you level, but most painful when you don’t. Kammris was my first toon, however, and at the time, I underestimated the importance of virtue selection.
I’ll be paying for my naiveté with a few weeks of mindless grinding.
/sigh
The good news is that the earliest deed requirements start with 30 mobs for the title, 60 for the virtue. Those requirements tend to double as you venture farther out into higher level zones. The highest I’ve seen so far is Angmar, 150 for the title, 300 for the virtue.
Luckily, Kammris is a champion and he chews through stuff pretty quickly. The biggest barrier is finding an area with a high concentration of the needed mobs. The higher the density, the faster the grinding goes as you don’t waste as much time waiting for respawns. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an onerous process. It’s fine when you grind these things as you level, but most painful when you don’t. Kammris was my first toon, however, and at the time, I underestimated the importance of virtue selection.
I’ll be paying for my naiveté with a few weeks of mindless grinding.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Reds
After watching 60 Minutes the other night, I’m convinced more than ever that most people involved with Wall Street and the banking industry would sell the United States of America if it meant making an extra dollar. I really do think that. As the months have passed since the economic shit hit the fan back in September and Congress has scolded and shamed automaker CEOs and banking CEOs and the morons in charge of the SEC, I contend that all these people knew full well the harm they were doing and went ahead and did it anyway because nothing was more important to them than making money.
Nothing. Not even the short and long term health of their nation’s economy.
An interesting side effect of our country’s financial crisis is the stark light that has been shined upon the excesses of the rich and powerful. I’m the world’s leading proponent of a free market system, but even I get urges for Red revolution when I read about billion dollar CEO salaries, spa retreats, and conventions in Vegas. Communism is clearly a failed economic philosophy, but there’s just something wrong about the fact that 5% of the world’s population owns more than 75% of the world’s wealth.
For the most rich and most powerful, it begs the question “How much is enough?” One million dollars? Five million? 20 million? A hundred million? I’m not wealthy myself and so can’t speak from experience, but it’s my estimation than any salary over 2 million dollars pushes well beyond the realm of good pay for a good day’s work and into the realm of compensatory substitution for a tiny wenis. With more than 5 billion people on the planet, does anyone really have the right to half dozen mansions and a dozen sports cars? Don’t million dollar salaries far exceed the amount of risk, work, and responsibility a human being undertakes in the name of running a company? In a free market system, are there limits to how much wealth one human being can accrue?
I know I sound like a commie bastard, but I’d like to remind any detractors that I wouldn’t be thinking these thoughts if the banking industry hadn’t bled our economy into cardiac arrest. If angry mobs rise up and burn and pillage the estates of the rich and powerful, all those BMW driving, caviar munching, polo playing elitists have no one to blame but themselves for killing the golden goose and unleashing a growing sentiment of disparity and unfairness within a slumbering U.S. citizenry.
I’ll be pleasantly surprised if we come out of the economic crisis unscathed, politically speaking.
Nothing. Not even the short and long term health of their nation’s economy.
An interesting side effect of our country’s financial crisis is the stark light that has been shined upon the excesses of the rich and powerful. I’m the world’s leading proponent of a free market system, but even I get urges for Red revolution when I read about billion dollar CEO salaries, spa retreats, and conventions in Vegas. Communism is clearly a failed economic philosophy, but there’s just something wrong about the fact that 5% of the world’s population owns more than 75% of the world’s wealth.
For the most rich and most powerful, it begs the question “How much is enough?” One million dollars? Five million? 20 million? A hundred million? I’m not wealthy myself and so can’t speak from experience, but it’s my estimation than any salary over 2 million dollars pushes well beyond the realm of good pay for a good day’s work and into the realm of compensatory substitution for a tiny wenis. With more than 5 billion people on the planet, does anyone really have the right to half dozen mansions and a dozen sports cars? Don’t million dollar salaries far exceed the amount of risk, work, and responsibility a human being undertakes in the name of running a company? In a free market system, are there limits to how much wealth one human being can accrue?
I know I sound like a commie bastard, but I’d like to remind any detractors that I wouldn’t be thinking these thoughts if the banking industry hadn’t bled our economy into cardiac arrest. If angry mobs rise up and burn and pillage the estates of the rich and powerful, all those BMW driving, caviar munching, polo playing elitists have no one to blame but themselves for killing the golden goose and unleashing a growing sentiment of disparity and unfairness within a slumbering U.S. citizenry.
I’ll be pleasantly surprised if we come out of the economic crisis unscathed, politically speaking.
Monday, February 16, 2009
A Minstrel's Best Spell Rotation
Perusing the Lord of the Rings Online forum boards, I stumbled upon a thread entitled “Solo Mob Spell Rotation,” or something to that effect. Curious, I took a gander and got quite an eyeful. Turns out (surprise, surprise) I have not been soloing with Lukenbach my minstrel as effectively as I could be. But first, here’s the general consensus among minstrel players of the best solo mob spell rotation:
1) Call of echoes – DoT, but more importantly lowers the mobs resistance
2) Ballad of Resonance – Buffs light damage
3) Call of Erome – AoE, but more importantly significantly lowers mob’s resistance to light damage
4) Piercing Cry – Best minstrel damage spell, best applied after Call of Erome
5) Noble Cause – Melee attack
6) Call of Second Age – AoE. Almost everyone includes this spell in the rotation, but it gobbles up a lot of power.
7) At this point, mob should be dead or close to it. Rinse and Repeat.
I tried this rotation and noticed immediate improvement in raw dps. I started seeing Piercing Cry crits in the 700s, where previously I had them peaking at no higher than 500. My old rotation included getting my three tier one ballads up and running, followed by Piercing Cry and Noble Cause. I only used Call of Erome and Call of Second Age for multiple mobs.
Big mistake.
Even though it’s an AoE attack, Call of Erome significantly decreases the chance a mob will resist a light based spell attack. Since mob resistance got jacked up for Mines of Moria, spells fizzling harmlessly of monsters emerged as one of the biggest new challenges facing minstrels in the expansion; it’s especially heartbreaking and frustrating when the best crit and damage spell a minstrel has, Piercing Cry, bounces off a mob’s hide.
But it need not be that way if the minstrel properly employs everything in his arsenal in the most advantageous order.
So I’ve got Lukenbach following this new solo spell rotation and really like his newly discovered killing efficiency. Even so, I’ve gone back to playing Kammris, my champion. Kam is almost 47, which puts him at the minimum level requirement for the teal one-handed swords I made months ago. I can’t wait to see Kammris turns into a human chainsaw with a pair of those beauties equipped.
1) Call of echoes – DoT, but more importantly lowers the mobs resistance
2) Ballad of Resonance – Buffs light damage
3) Call of Erome – AoE, but more importantly significantly lowers mob’s resistance to light damage
4) Piercing Cry – Best minstrel damage spell, best applied after Call of Erome
5) Noble Cause – Melee attack
6) Call of Second Age – AoE. Almost everyone includes this spell in the rotation, but it gobbles up a lot of power.
7) At this point, mob should be dead or close to it. Rinse and Repeat.
I tried this rotation and noticed immediate improvement in raw dps. I started seeing Piercing Cry crits in the 700s, where previously I had them peaking at no higher than 500. My old rotation included getting my three tier one ballads up and running, followed by Piercing Cry and Noble Cause. I only used Call of Erome and Call of Second Age for multiple mobs.
Big mistake.
Even though it’s an AoE attack, Call of Erome significantly decreases the chance a mob will resist a light based spell attack. Since mob resistance got jacked up for Mines of Moria, spells fizzling harmlessly of monsters emerged as one of the biggest new challenges facing minstrels in the expansion; it’s especially heartbreaking and frustrating when the best crit and damage spell a minstrel has, Piercing Cry, bounces off a mob’s hide.
But it need not be that way if the minstrel properly employs everything in his arsenal in the most advantageous order.
So I’ve got Lukenbach following this new solo spell rotation and really like his newly discovered killing efficiency. Even so, I’ve gone back to playing Kammris, my champion. Kam is almost 47, which puts him at the minimum level requirement for the teal one-handed swords I made months ago. I can’t wait to see Kammris turns into a human chainsaw with a pair of those beauties equipped.
Monday, February 9, 2009
The DM Is Tired . . .
Long live the DM!
Craig, the current Dungeon Master of my heart, turned traitor and wants to rejoin the filthy player ranks, creating a power vacuum by which not one, but two former friends wrestle each other in warm pudding for the right to Master Dungeons
With a campaign ending and another starting anew, the new management requested each player to list their top two or three character choices. Here are mine, ranked in my order of preference. Please note I went to considerable trouble naming my prospects, ascribing them a homeland, and triangulating their religious affiliation.
1) Stick Powers
Luskan Half-elf Warlock, devote worshipper of Asmodeus
2) Luz Canun
Vilhon Wilds Minotaur Barbarian, raging follower of Gruumsh
3) Waylon Pacadyrm
Calishman Genasi Swordmage, lukewarm devotee of Oghma
I can't tell which will be the bigger deal-breaker, my name or race selections.
Craig, the current Dungeon Master of my heart, turned traitor and wants to rejoin the filthy player ranks, creating a power vacuum by which not one, but two former friends wrestle each other in warm pudding for the right to Master Dungeons
With a campaign ending and another starting anew, the new management requested each player to list their top two or three character choices. Here are mine, ranked in my order of preference. Please note I went to considerable trouble naming my prospects, ascribing them a homeland, and triangulating their religious affiliation.
1) Stick Powers
Luskan Half-elf Warlock, devote worshipper of Asmodeus
2) Luz Canun
Vilhon Wilds Minotaur Barbarian, raging follower of Gruumsh
3) Waylon Pacadyrm
Calishman Genasi Swordmage, lukewarm devotee of Oghma
I can't tell which will be the bigger deal-breaker, my name or race selections.
Dragon Age Slips to the End of the Year
I'm late reporting this, but my intention isn't to report, but to bitch.
In most circumstances, I could give a rat's ass when EA elects to release its games. But when they bought Bioware last year, I cringed that they would apply their asshat business tactics to a company I not only respect, but dearly love. The dudes at Bioware have made some of my favorite games and Dragon Age looks to be another classic waiting in the wings.
That being said, EA can kiss my hairy ass. Delaying Dragon Age to coincide "with the release of the console versions of Dragon Age: Origins?"
What. The. Frankincense.
If this shit river flowed both ways, I wouldn't be so incensed. But a ton of titles release console first, with the PC version following months later. I've never heard of a console game being delayed for a simultaneous release with its PC sibling. So why give PC the shaft now? Because the PC is the thinking man's machine, inaccessible to the masses, and thus a poor marketer of goods and services. God save a country whose citizenry can't master a technology more complicated than opening a tray and placing a shiny disc inside it.
This irks me even more because I watched an X-Play interview of a Bioware employee bragging about how much Dragon Age payed homage to the PC platform by getting its version in advance of the console crowd.
The very definition of talking out of your ass.
In most circumstances, I could give a rat's ass when EA elects to release its games. But when they bought Bioware last year, I cringed that they would apply their asshat business tactics to a company I not only respect, but dearly love. The dudes at Bioware have made some of my favorite games and Dragon Age looks to be another classic waiting in the wings.
That being said, EA can kiss my hairy ass. Delaying Dragon Age to coincide "with the release of the console versions of Dragon Age: Origins?"
What. The. Frankincense.
If this shit river flowed both ways, I wouldn't be so incensed. But a ton of titles release console first, with the PC version following months later. I've never heard of a console game being delayed for a simultaneous release with its PC sibling. So why give PC the shaft now? Because the PC is the thinking man's machine, inaccessible to the masses, and thus a poor marketer of goods and services. God save a country whose citizenry can't master a technology more complicated than opening a tray and placing a shiny disc inside it.
This irks me even more because I watched an X-Play interview of a Bioware employee bragging about how much Dragon Age payed homage to the PC platform by getting its version in advance of the console crowd.
The very definition of talking out of your ass.
Grind the Good Grind
After feasting at the tables of Grand Theft Auto IV and Fallout 3, I've once again returned to some MMO fare, namely Lord of the Rings Online. I spent a good chunk of Saturday splitting my time between Kammris and Lukenbach, both of whom are sliver close to leveling, 46 and 56 respectively.
I've learned something valuable from this past month's MMO respite. Right before I took a break from LotRO, I had been grinding Lukenbach's traits. Early in my minstrel's career, I had done a remarkable job of keeping his traits up to date. I had a zone-clear policy whereby Lukenbach wasn't allowed to exit a zone until he had completed every trait that region offered. With that policy in place, Lukenbach's traits scaled right along with his leveling.
Now, that plan is all well and good for those early zones; entry level traits have modest grinding requirements, 60 mobs for the title, another 60 for the trait. But later zones grow just shy of exponentially, 150 for the title and300 for the trait. Such numbers track well past my MMO gaming patience and faced with such daunting numbers, Lukenbach quickly abandoned his high horse policy and placed trait grinding on the back burner at every opportunity.
That catches up with you at higher levels. And after the recent expansion, along with new content, Turbine applied some different mathematics to Mines of Moria. It's beyond the scope of this entry to outline the changes. Suffice to say, every class got a dose of nerf, made even more painful by those players who had neglected their traits.
So in the late days of December 2008, Lukenbach reluctantly turned his attention back to trait grinding only after getting his ass kicked over and over again in the Mines. The problem is that trait grinding always precipitates me dropping the game for extended periods of times. Which is too bad because when I played again last Saturday, I marveled anew at the scale, detail, and fun inside Moria.
I have more trait work to do (like the slaying of 200 more hillman in Angmar). But that will have to wait else I stop playing again. I'm not sure how or when I'm going to get those 200 savaged killed. Maybe when minstrel's get the new skill, Nuclear Chord.
I've learned something valuable from this past month's MMO respite. Right before I took a break from LotRO, I had been grinding Lukenbach's traits. Early in my minstrel's career, I had done a remarkable job of keeping his traits up to date. I had a zone-clear policy whereby Lukenbach wasn't allowed to exit a zone until he had completed every trait that region offered. With that policy in place, Lukenbach's traits scaled right along with his leveling.
Now, that plan is all well and good for those early zones; entry level traits have modest grinding requirements, 60 mobs for the title, another 60 for the trait. But later zones grow just shy of exponentially, 150 for the title and
That catches up with you at higher levels. And after the recent expansion, along with new content, Turbine applied some different mathematics to Mines of Moria. It's beyond the scope of this entry to outline the changes. Suffice to say, every class got a dose of nerf, made even more painful by those players who had neglected their traits.
So in the late days of December 2008, Lukenbach reluctantly turned his attention back to trait grinding only after getting his ass kicked over and over again in the Mines. The problem is that trait grinding always precipitates me dropping the game for extended periods of times. Which is too bad because when I played again last Saturday, I marveled anew at the scale, detail, and fun inside Moria.
I have more trait work to do (like the slaying of 200 more hillman in Angmar). But that will have to wait else I stop playing again. I'm not sure how or when I'm going to get those 200 savaged killed. Maybe when minstrel's get the new skill, Nuclear Chord.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
The Christian Bale Rant
I have to admit, I loved the Christian Bale rant that exploded on this past week's headlines. it was long as it was eloquent and will serve as radio DJ fodder for years to come.
You can hear Christian explain the context of the rant and apologize for it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twjEIWL1vTs
You can hear Christian explain the context of the rant and apologize for it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=twjEIWL1vTs
Deathbed
I've been near death these last few days. It all started last Sunday night when I felt a tiny tickle in my throat as I watched the Super Bowl. The next day I felt run down, but functional. That Monday night after work, I crashed. Headache, slight fever, congestion. The whole nine yards. I took Tuesday off and seemed to get better. I returned to work Wednesday but Thursday witnessed an acute relapse, which unfortunately coincided with an important presentation I had to give to about forty peer librarians. I got through my presentation relatively unscathed, but went home early.
I've been at home curled up in a fetal position ever since.
I'm feeling better as I write this, Saturday afternoon, but I'm by no means completely healthy. I don't know what kind of wonder bug I contracted but it's a tenacious little beast that has its claws firmly sunk in my upper esophagus. At the height of my fever-induced delirium, I fantasized wrapping my lips around the end of a flamethrower and hitting the trigger because gallons of boiling tea just doesn't seem to be doing the trick.
I'm also picturing scraping the infection off with a butter knife, like sliding peanut better off a slice of bread, but I haven't worked out the logistics of maneuvering the utensil down my throat.
I've been at home curled up in a fetal position ever since.
I'm feeling better as I write this, Saturday afternoon, but I'm by no means completely healthy. I don't know what kind of wonder bug I contracted but it's a tenacious little beast that has its claws firmly sunk in my upper esophagus. At the height of my fever-induced delirium, I fantasized wrapping my lips around the end of a flamethrower and hitting the trigger because gallons of boiling tea just doesn't seem to be doing the trick.
I'm also picturing scraping the infection off with a butter knife, like sliding peanut better off a slice of bread, but I haven't worked out the logistics of maneuvering the utensil down my throat.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
Born to Folk
I think it's the funniest show on TV today and now that its new season has begun, CNN has an interview with Bret and Jemaine and their show Flight of the Conchords.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
D&D Insider
I’ve been playing 4th edition Dungeons and Dragons for more than six months now, but I’ve largely ignored Wizard of the Coast’s flagship website, D&D Insider. The company now electronically publishes its Dragon and Dungeon magazines and a subscription to D&Di grants unlimited access to them, the Character Builder, and the Compendium, a database of the entire game.
On a whim, I visited the site and discovered that it was in the midst of previewing a huge chunk of content for the upcoming print release of Player’s Handbook 2. Among the previews, the barbarian class, levels 1-30, and the bard, druid, and sorcerer classes, levels 1-3. Even better, the company’s Character Builder is basically a front interface for their compendium database. The builder updates as the game does, which means that yesterday I had the option of creating a barbarian character even though the class has yet to appear in print form. Intrigued, I went ahead and ponied up $8 for a month’s worth of access.
I’ve already recreated Queequeg using the builder and absolutely love it. Leveling my dragonborn warlord to level 7 was just as easy as if I was creating a lowbie character. Powers and feats and magic items all provide descriptions straight out of their respective books. And as mentioned earlier, every book is tapped, everything from the core set to Martial Power and the Adventurer’s Vault to various articles from Dragon magazine.
Even module specific magic items are included! Aecris, the longsword Queequeg acquired while adventuring in Shadowfell Keep, is right alongside an entire host of other enchanted blades.
As good as all this is there is a problem: cost. Right now, WoTC charges $7.95 a month for access to the bounty of D&Di. They’ve threatened that the monthly cost will significantly rise upon the full release of the Character Builder. I’ve heard rumors they want to charge $15 per month, the same as most MMOs, but nothing official has been released yet.
I can understand Wizard’s urge to cash in on the monthly revenue model of a MMO. I just don’t know if it’s going to fly. Lots of people complain about $15 a month for World of Warcraft, even after they’ve averaged hours of playtime per day. D&Di is not a game itself, but instead a well-designed database. I have my doubts that a majority of 4th edition gamers are going to shell out $15 a month on a consistent basis. I can see them subscribing occasionally, a month here, a month there. But not month after month, for years at a time. If Wizards anticipates sporadic subscriptions as well, and has built their revenue expectations around that, than all is well. But if they’re expecting World of Warcraft-esque subscription behavior, then I despair for the game’s future, or at least the fate of D&Di over the long haul.
On a whim, I visited the site and discovered that it was in the midst of previewing a huge chunk of content for the upcoming print release of Player’s Handbook 2. Among the previews, the barbarian class, levels 1-30, and the bard, druid, and sorcerer classes, levels 1-3. Even better, the company’s Character Builder is basically a front interface for their compendium database. The builder updates as the game does, which means that yesterday I had the option of creating a barbarian character even though the class has yet to appear in print form. Intrigued, I went ahead and ponied up $8 for a month’s worth of access.
I’ve already recreated Queequeg using the builder and absolutely love it. Leveling my dragonborn warlord to level 7 was just as easy as if I was creating a lowbie character. Powers and feats and magic items all provide descriptions straight out of their respective books. And as mentioned earlier, every book is tapped, everything from the core set to Martial Power and the Adventurer’s Vault to various articles from Dragon magazine.
Even module specific magic items are included! Aecris, the longsword Queequeg acquired while adventuring in Shadowfell Keep, is right alongside an entire host of other enchanted blades.
As good as all this is there is a problem: cost. Right now, WoTC charges $7.95 a month for access to the bounty of D&Di. They’ve threatened that the monthly cost will significantly rise upon the full release of the Character Builder. I’ve heard rumors they want to charge $15 per month, the same as most MMOs, but nothing official has been released yet.
I can understand Wizard’s urge to cash in on the monthly revenue model of a MMO. I just don’t know if it’s going to fly. Lots of people complain about $15 a month for World of Warcraft, even after they’ve averaged hours of playtime per day. D&Di is not a game itself, but instead a well-designed database. I have my doubts that a majority of 4th edition gamers are going to shell out $15 a month on a consistent basis. I can see them subscribing occasionally, a month here, a month there. But not month after month, for years at a time. If Wizards anticipates sporadic subscriptions as well, and has built their revenue expectations around that, than all is well. But if they’re expecting World of Warcraft-esque subscription behavior, then I despair for the game’s future, or at least the fate of D&Di over the long haul.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Sarah Palin Is My Operation: Anchorage
I bought Operation: Anchorage, the new downloadable content for one of the best games of 2008, Fallout 3. Tycho from Penny Arcade does a great job of complaining about the Games for Windows interface needed to buy and download the add-on, so I won’t dwell on how counter-intuitive that mechanism is. Except to say I find it unbelievable that Microsoft couldn’t come with something better FOR THEIR OWN OPERATING SYSTEM.
It’s also pretty lame that Operation: Anchorage costs 800 Microsoft points, but Games for Windows only sells the points in 500 point blocks. In other words, if you’ve got a zero bank of points, you’ll have to spend $12.50 for 1000 points rather than $10.00 for 800. $2.50 isn’t a deal breaker, but it’s pretty clear that Microsoft’s marketing scheme is to get people to buy excess points they don’t need or want. That doesn’t do much to improve my opinion of Microsoft; I’m sure the company is wringing its hands with guilt and worry over my displeasure and drying their tears with wads of cash.
But the add-on itself is hella fun. Not long after you resume your game, you start to receive a radio distress call that summons you to the southwestern DC metro area. There, you meet some Outcasts battling super mutants and defending a curious military installation. Inside the base, a pod hooked up to a super computer shines brightly. You climb inside the egg and the computer runs a simulation of the battle for Anchorage, the major offensive to push the Chinese out of Alaska.
The simulation plops you down in the middle of an Alaskan mountain range. You have a partner that abandons you in favor of climbing the side of a mountain. He promises to meet up with you later and I have to admit I enjoyed watching him scale the cliff face. Like watching Stallone in Cliffhanger, without the melodrama.
The goal is to take out some artillery guns the Chinese have strewn throughout a mountain base complex they’ve built. The graphics are stunning, mostly because the sky is blue and the complex appears relatively shiny and new. It’s a stark contrast from the usual devastation of Fallout 3.
As a simulation, you still take damage and you can still die—something about going into cardiac arrest, blah blah blah. But your Chinese enemies fade to a blue glow when you kill them and metal dispensers instantly replenish your ammo. It’s a computer game within a computer game, so you can backtrack and hit health and ammo replenishers as often and as much as you like.
I don’t know how far I’m in yet, having just rendezvoused with my fellow soldier. I can say I love the new Gauss rifle. Ammo for it is scarce, but for good reason, as I one-shot just about everything I aim at. However it ends, I’d really like to see an appearance by my favorite Alaskan hottie, Sarah Palin. I know it’s set 77 years in the future, but it’s also a simulation; Bethesda could go hog wild and plop her in there no problem. Like maybe on a frozen mountain peak, clad in nothing but a bikini and a smile.
Oh yeah, that’s the stuff.
It’s also pretty lame that Operation: Anchorage costs 800 Microsoft points, but Games for Windows only sells the points in 500 point blocks. In other words, if you’ve got a zero bank of points, you’ll have to spend $12.50 for 1000 points rather than $10.00 for 800. $2.50 isn’t a deal breaker, but it’s pretty clear that Microsoft’s marketing scheme is to get people to buy excess points they don’t need or want. That doesn’t do much to improve my opinion of Microsoft; I’m sure the company is wringing its hands with guilt and worry over my displeasure and drying their tears with wads of cash.
But the add-on itself is hella fun. Not long after you resume your game, you start to receive a radio distress call that summons you to the southwestern DC metro area. There, you meet some Outcasts battling super mutants and defending a curious military installation. Inside the base, a pod hooked up to a super computer shines brightly. You climb inside the egg and the computer runs a simulation of the battle for Anchorage, the major offensive to push the Chinese out of Alaska.
The simulation plops you down in the middle of an Alaskan mountain range. You have a partner that abandons you in favor of climbing the side of a mountain. He promises to meet up with you later and I have to admit I enjoyed watching him scale the cliff face. Like watching Stallone in Cliffhanger, without the melodrama.
The goal is to take out some artillery guns the Chinese have strewn throughout a mountain base complex they’ve built. The graphics are stunning, mostly because the sky is blue and the complex appears relatively shiny and new. It’s a stark contrast from the usual devastation of Fallout 3.
As a simulation, you still take damage and you can still die—something about going into cardiac arrest, blah blah blah. But your Chinese enemies fade to a blue glow when you kill them and metal dispensers instantly replenish your ammo. It’s a computer game within a computer game, so you can backtrack and hit health and ammo replenishers as often and as much as you like.
I don’t know how far I’m in yet, having just rendezvoused with my fellow soldier. I can say I love the new Gauss rifle. Ammo for it is scarce, but for good reason, as I one-shot just about everything I aim at. However it ends, I’d really like to see an appearance by my favorite Alaskan hottie, Sarah Palin. I know it’s set 77 years in the future, but it’s also a simulation; Bethesda could go hog wild and plop her in there no problem. Like maybe on a frozen mountain peak, clad in nothing but a bikini and a smile.
Oh yeah, that’s the stuff.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Pork Product
Wifezilla made pork sandwiches last night. They were good, though chewy as pork bites would cling stubbornly to the main sandwich by narrow strands of sinew. I hate when my bite pulls the whole slab out of the bun and onto my plate, or worse, lap.
Midway through the meal, Hallie asked what pork was. I told her pork came from pigs. Five minutes later, she took the final bite from her sandwich and proclaimed, “I’m all out of pig!”
Wifezilla shuddered conspicuously.
Midway through the meal, Hallie asked what pork was. I told her pork came from pigs. Five minutes later, she took the final bite from her sandwich and proclaimed, “I’m all out of pig!”
Wifezilla shuddered conspicuously.
Hard Ain't So Hard
As promised, I played a Rock Band 2 song on Hard this past weekend. The experience was a lesson in mindset. Just a few weeks ago, I exclusively played songs on Easy; I had convinced myself that Medium was too hard. But after some experimentation with seating and foot positioning, I started rolling through Medium songs. Motorhead’s Ace of Spades reared its ugly head once again and I managed to plow through it on Medium, though with a low score.
On a whim, I fired up Survivor’s Eye of the Tiger on Hard and five starred it with a score in the 90 percentile. Clearly, song difficulty eclipses game difficulty in terms of required skill parameters. Rock Band 2 lists song difficulty via a five star award system for each of the instruments. Especially difficult songs receive five devil heads instead of the stars, like Ace of Spades on drums.
I’m going to practice a bit more on Medium, but plan to play more and more on Hard. Depending on the song and the speed, Expert may just be a drum beat away.
On a whim, I fired up Survivor’s Eye of the Tiger on Hard and five starred it with a score in the 90 percentile. Clearly, song difficulty eclipses game difficulty in terms of required skill parameters. Rock Band 2 lists song difficulty via a five star award system for each of the instruments. Especially difficult songs receive five devil heads instead of the stars, like Ace of Spades on drums.
I’m going to practice a bit more on Medium, but plan to play more and more on Hard. Depending on the song and the speed, Expert may just be a drum beat away.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Fonzie Schemes
Remember Jack Abramoff? He’s the dude who allegedly defrauded American Indian tribes of millions of dollars, something to do with campaign contributions I recall.
Remember Bernie Madoff? He’s the dude who squandered/stole some $50 billion from various investors, charities, and financial institutions via a Ponzi scheme, the illegal act of using newly recruited investor money to pay investment dividends rather than good, old fashioned profits.
Does it crack anyone else up that both men’s names end in “off?” It does me! In fact, I’ve even gone so far as to coin Jack as “Abra the Moff,” after my favorite space smuggler, Jabba the Hutt. It doesn’t work as well with Bernie. God knows I’ve tried. “Madoff” begs for a third or fourth syllable to effectively pull off the Hutt transformation.
And speaking of Ponzi schemes, does anyone else think of Fonzie? As in Arthur Fonzarelli? I do! I picture that a Fonzie scheme closely resembles its cousin Ponzi, except that in a Fonzie scheme, after you bilk your investors of all their money, you jerk your thumb out at them and declare, “Aaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy.”
It warms my heart that in the midst of such financial treachery, I can stretch it all right back to Star Wars and Happy Days. It’s a gift.
Remember Bernie Madoff? He’s the dude who squandered/stole some $50 billion from various investors, charities, and financial institutions via a Ponzi scheme, the illegal act of using newly recruited investor money to pay investment dividends rather than good, old fashioned profits.
Does it crack anyone else up that both men’s names end in “off?” It does me! In fact, I’ve even gone so far as to coin Jack as “Abra the Moff,” after my favorite space smuggler, Jabba the Hutt. It doesn’t work as well with Bernie. God knows I’ve tried. “Madoff” begs for a third or fourth syllable to effectively pull off the Hutt transformation.
And speaking of Ponzi schemes, does anyone else think of Fonzie? As in Arthur Fonzarelli? I do! I picture that a Fonzie scheme closely resembles its cousin Ponzi, except that in a Fonzie scheme, after you bilk your investors of all their money, you jerk your thumb out at them and declare, “Aaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy.”
It warms my heart that in the midst of such financial treachery, I can stretch it all right back to Star Wars and Happy Days. It’s a gift.
TELL ME WHERE TONY IS! I SAID TELL ME WHERE TONY IS!
Last night Wifezilla and I finished the fourth hour of the new 24 season premiere. On its seventh “day,” I really can’t complain about the series anymore. It’s like going to an Adam Sandler movie, you know what you’re getting the moment you sit down and start to watch. When it sucks and you look about you for someone to blame, find the nearest mirror and glare longingly until your angst subsides because no one else wants to listen to you bitch about that which is empirically bad.
As many have already pointed out, the latest season of 24 plugs into its usual formula of international terrorists, hijacked American technology, and intel-leaky U.S. government agencies. There are some small twists, of course, like the return of the once-dead Tony Almeda or the complete absence of CTU, the fictional Counter-Terrorist Unit. And then there are some things that remain the same, like Jack yelling commands twice and than applying lethal force before uttering the third. I did enjoy the fact that Jack wasted little time in commandeering a Bic pen and lowering it within inches of a suspect’s eyeballs to withdraw some reluctant information. That dude is hardcore.
Wait, I just got done writing that you can’t complain about 24. Looks like I’m doing just that. Never fear though, Lost on ABC and Flight of the Conchords on HBO premiere next Sunday. And if you don’t like watching good TV, you can join the petite and lumpen proletariat and watch The Biggest Loser or the new season of American Idol.
When I get tired of observing Jack waterboarding various international criminals in the name of U.S. national security, I just know Jemaine and Bret’s wacky antics won’t fail to entertain.
As many have already pointed out, the latest season of 24 plugs into its usual formula of international terrorists, hijacked American technology, and intel-leaky U.S. government agencies. There are some small twists, of course, like the return of the once-dead Tony Almeda or the complete absence of CTU, the fictional Counter-Terrorist Unit. And then there are some things that remain the same, like Jack yelling commands twice and than applying lethal force before uttering the third. I did enjoy the fact that Jack wasted little time in commandeering a Bic pen and lowering it within inches of a suspect’s eyeballs to withdraw some reluctant information. That dude is hardcore.
Wait, I just got done writing that you can’t complain about 24. Looks like I’m doing just that. Never fear though, Lost on ABC and Flight of the Conchords on HBO premiere next Sunday. And if you don’t like watching good TV, you can join the petite and lumpen proletariat and watch The Biggest Loser or the new season of American Idol.
When I get tired of observing Jack waterboarding various international criminals in the name of U.S. national security, I just know Jemaine and Bret’s wacky antics won’t fail to entertain.
Fourth and Inches
I’ve been tearing through Medium level songs on Rock Band 2 these last few nights. One day, I can’t get through Medium, the next I five star nearly every song I play, with 95% ratings to boot.
The difference? I scooted back half a foot from the kit.
The bass drum has long been my Achilles’ Heel (bahaha). I had my foot at a constant 45 degree angle with the floor and the strain of maintaining that position tired my foot and ankle muscles, making it almost impossible to play difficult bass drum parts. I could roll through Easy levels songs because the bass drum is almost non-existent. But Medium adds the bass drum liberally, often pairing it with a red or blue beat. The beat patterns also get more difficult, so much so that hitting the bass drum requires instinctual timing and reaction.
So the other night, I thought about my foot getting tired and scooted my chair half a foot from the kit. At first, I didn’t like this position because the drums felt like they were too far away. But when I placed my foot on the drum pedal, I knew I was in flavor country. To test my new footing, I went back and started playing early songs on Medium. I tore through them just like I do Easy. Less than a foot back and Medium becomes the new Easy. Who knew?
This weekend, I’m going to fire up Hard and see how I fare.
Oh, and before you opine me as some kind of drumming genius, Motorhead’s Ace of Spades came up the other night and I failed it miserably on Medium. It wasn’t even close. Even more embarrassing, I failed the song while Wifezilla kept strumming along. I swear there’s a metal heart lurking deep within the ribcage of my wife. I played the song later on Easy and barely survived at 67%, a three star rating.
God I loath that song.
The difference? I scooted back half a foot from the kit.
The bass drum has long been my Achilles’ Heel (bahaha). I had my foot at a constant 45 degree angle with the floor and the strain of maintaining that position tired my foot and ankle muscles, making it almost impossible to play difficult bass drum parts. I could roll through Easy levels songs because the bass drum is almost non-existent. But Medium adds the bass drum liberally, often pairing it with a red or blue beat. The beat patterns also get more difficult, so much so that hitting the bass drum requires instinctual timing and reaction.
So the other night, I thought about my foot getting tired and scooted my chair half a foot from the kit. At first, I didn’t like this position because the drums felt like they were too far away. But when I placed my foot on the drum pedal, I knew I was in flavor country. To test my new footing, I went back and started playing early songs on Medium. I tore through them just like I do Easy. Less than a foot back and Medium becomes the new Easy. Who knew?
This weekend, I’m going to fire up Hard and see how I fare.
Oh, and before you opine me as some kind of drumming genius, Motorhead’s Ace of Spades came up the other night and I failed it miserably on Medium. It wasn’t even close. Even more embarrassing, I failed the song while Wifezilla kept strumming along. I swear there’s a metal heart lurking deep within the ribcage of my wife. I played the song later on Easy and barely survived at 67%, a three star rating.
God I loath that song.
Slash and Burn
Coming off the news that Funcom is consolidating its Age of Conan servers from 40 some down to 18, I pondered the status of the few people I personally know who still play a MMO. Two friends strike me in particular, a (now) married couple whom I met back when I played Everquest II. Around the time I quit EQII, they did too. Whilst I wandered back to World of Warcraft, they cranked up the then recently released Lord of the Rings Online. Some months later, I read of their heroic antics on the old EQII guild board and got inspired to try the game. At that time, both had toons in the low 40s, some ten levels shy of the cap. I ran with them and their tiny guild for a couple of weeks, but it turned out their interest was waning just as mine waxed. One day I noticed neither had logged in for a days. Days turned to weeks. Weeks to months. They never did return.
I kept following their exploits though. They continued posting on the same forum board, this time under the then newly released MMO Tabulas Rosa. They chewed through that Sci-Fi game pretty quickly, moving on to Pirates of the Burning Sea. And then Age of Conan. And then Warhammer. They threw in some WoW somewhere in the middle of that mix, I couldn't honestly tell you when. Or how. And with each new MMO, they created a matching guild or clan.
I kept following their exploits though. They continued posting on the same forum board, this time under the then newly released MMO Tabulas Rosa. They chewed through that Sci-Fi game pretty quickly, moving on to Pirates of the Burning Sea. And then Age of Conan. And then Warhammer. They threw in some WoW somewhere in the middle of that mix, I couldn't honestly tell you when. Or how. And with each new MMO, they created a matching guild or clan.
I'm not sure what my point is here. I'm not criticising them for playing multiple MMOs because I do the same thing. The difference, I guess, is I don't continually form and reform guilds. Guild management, everything from formation to maintenance, smacks too closely to that of a real world job. It puzzles me to no end that the couple never seems weary of the chore.
Scratch that.
They do weary of it, but then turn around and start the whole process anew with a brand new shiny MMO. I'm guessing they crave character creation and early leveling over end-game content; they have a blast at early to mid levels, but then grow jaded with the game (or MMO gameplay in general) toward the cap. Which is fine in and of itself. It's perfectly natural, even healthy, to play a variety of games. But constantly hammering together guilds with each flavor of the month MMO? That's not so good.
As often as they've created and abandoned guilds, I guess my advice to couple would be to continue trying the latest and greatest of the MMO genre, but forgo founding their own guilds and instead join something already established. There are plenty of casual guilds across all MMOs and most don't mind adding anonymous folk to their ranks. A fan of early to midland MMO content could play to their heart's content and then walk away when the experience sours, all without one single drop of sweat devoted to guild creation. It could be they get satisfaction from creating and running guilds, but I'll bet my highest level WoW toon that their membership likely tires of their inevitable abandonment.
Which makes MMOs some of the strangest, most frustrating social experiments of the last decade. I'd advise a budding sociologist biding to make a name for themselves to tackle this topic; I think it's ripe with critical analysis.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
A Fall Worth Regretting
Last Friday, I found out that a former colleague of mine resigned his position in the district for personal circumstances that made it “difficult for him to continue his leadership position.” The details of his fall from grace aren’t as important as the consequences: potential career ending job loss.
To say nothing of his family. My friend was married with two little kids. At the very least, the marriage is now strained. It might even be broken.
I find this revelation tremendously stressful and disappoining because Scott (not his real name) was an outstanding school administer. He was the best assistant principal I ever worked with. To this day, I haven’t encountered his equal. Scott was one of those people who possessed a rare combination of professional abilities; he exuded leadership qualities, possessed outstanding interpersonal skills, and worked tirelessly to advance the causes of the students under his care. Everyone liked Scott, staff and students alike. He was the kind of person that made everyone around him feel at ease, relaxed, appreciated.
I’m just stunned at the speed of his fall and the circumstances surrounding it. If someone had told me to predict the most likely candidate for an on-the-job extra-marital affair, Scott would have literally been the last person I would have thought of.
And now he’s essentially ended his educational career, at least in the immediate surrounding area. He and his wife will likely split. Two innocent children will now have to endure the pain of divorce. I bet Scott is wringing his hands right now, regretting everything that led up to this point. I bet he wishes he could do it all over again, erase the affair and rewind back to the point where he was a beloved father, respected community member, and admired principal. He sacrificed nearly everything for the excitement and allure and heat of something new. I’m sure he found the price steep.
So I regret this loss of a man as good and fine as any of us, withhold judgment of what he did, and wish him the best for whatever comes next.
To say nothing of his family. My friend was married with two little kids. At the very least, the marriage is now strained. It might even be broken.
I find this revelation tremendously stressful and disappoining because Scott (not his real name) was an outstanding school administer. He was the best assistant principal I ever worked with. To this day, I haven’t encountered his equal. Scott was one of those people who possessed a rare combination of professional abilities; he exuded leadership qualities, possessed outstanding interpersonal skills, and worked tirelessly to advance the causes of the students under his care. Everyone liked Scott, staff and students alike. He was the kind of person that made everyone around him feel at ease, relaxed, appreciated.
I’m just stunned at the speed of his fall and the circumstances surrounding it. If someone had told me to predict the most likely candidate for an on-the-job extra-marital affair, Scott would have literally been the last person I would have thought of.
And now he’s essentially ended his educational career, at least in the immediate surrounding area. He and his wife will likely split. Two innocent children will now have to endure the pain of divorce. I bet Scott is wringing his hands right now, regretting everything that led up to this point. I bet he wishes he could do it all over again, erase the affair and rewind back to the point where he was a beloved father, respected community member, and admired principal. He sacrificed nearly everything for the excitement and allure and heat of something new. I’m sure he found the price steep.
So I regret this loss of a man as good and fine as any of us, withhold judgment of what he did, and wish him the best for whatever comes next.
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